Awake
by NanaMun
Summary: Last installment of "Sleep", EdwardxJacob, When our eyes are open, reality can be so much stranger than a dream
1. Monsters Revisted

**Author's Notes:**

I like to alert any new readers or those that simply have forgotten with time, that this is a **4th installment** to a series of stories ("Sleep" "Nightmares" "Illusions" In that order) and it would be REALLY confusing if you A) haven't read the last installments lately, or B) haven't read them at all. And if you decide to re-read the first three than I'll say it here that I apologize for any type of grammar errors . I'm -for the most part- a beta-less writer and that makes writing a very messy event. I do plan on revising and editing the first three installments and making them all pretty since FF apparently enjoys butchering my text lay-out. I did pay particular attention to this chapter. I'm trying to be better with errors. **I've also came back and re-edited this for you guys. Hope there is an improvement,**

**DISCLAIMER: WEREPIRE HOMOEROTICA. DON'T LIKE. KINDLY ESCORT YOUR BUM OUT. **

This chapter's lyrical collaboration is **Bent **by **Matchbox Twenty**.

I own only an odd and twisted mind, but not the characters for which I depict in this fictional story. All rights to SM

**Awake**

**Chapter One: Monsters Revisited**

_If I fall along the way_

_Pick me up and dust me off_

_And if I get too tired to make it_

_Be my breath so I can walk_

**Jacob**

I made a monster out of myself.

And who did I have to thank?

But it really didn't matter. I was there, over him, reliving a memory that haunted me like a fucking ghost. No matter how complete, fucking _blissful_ I felt with him in my arms, the truth was still between us now revealed. The betrayal and fury I saw his eyes hurt just as much as going days without him. I'd die to right everything, for him not to hurt again.

My mouth couldn't open to speak, but my mind sped through a lifetime of thoughts.

_This is what I've been hiding. I couldn't hurt you. I _can't _hurt you. I'm sorry. _

I pulled away from him, sitting on my heels. My cock softening in its post release state, unaware of the mistake I just made.

I couldn't stand it. What I was doing to him.

_Kill me._

**Edward**

_If I need some other love_

_Give me more than I can stand_

_And when my smile gets old and faded_

_Wait around I'll smile again_

_Shouldn't be so complicated_

_Just hold me and then_

_Just hold me again_

It was a pain I never felt before. I was on the precipice of insanity, my will crumbling with each bombarding image. Crimson eyes, bright with glee, Jacob's reverberating screams. He replayed every thought and my insides _ached_.

There was so much to take in.

_He'll never want me._

_ I'm a monster._

_ I need him._

_ I can't live if he knows._

_ He'll leave me._

My Everything. My reason for _being_. I hurt for _him_, not for myself. There was nothing that'd make me leave him except his wish for me to do so. The conversation with Sam overlapped the violent memories. Words exchanged in Sam's attempt at comfort.

_"What if I did betray him?"_

The week of holding back, building up the wall to keep me out, crashed and crumbled and the memories flew at me with such momentum. The howls of his pain, the sleepless nights, the lost moments staring at the sea contemplating taking his life. Just when I'd thought I'd reached the edge, I heard his plea, his words to me:

_I'm sorry. Kill me._

A choked, pained sob escaped my throat as I came back to the present, seeing his defeated form in the moonlight. I wanted to scream, to rampage. I felt the _burn _to kill, to make something suffer as he had. He didn't deserve this. And he wouldn't suffer it in vain.

He didn't understand it then, but our lives were interconnected. His joy was mine, his pain was my own as well. And when he suffered, I died all over again. I sat up, swiftly and quick enough for him not to notice. He expected anger, but there was nothing in me that could direct this _deep_ hatred toward him. It wasn't his fault. It was theirs, it was _his._

"Look at me." The raw pain in my voice was so mortal and...alive. Couldn't he see that he did this to me? That the pain was so tangible, I could feel the _waves_ of it off of his body? I was in touch with him and he was every part of me. Why couldn't he see this? My throat burned at the mere thought of ending his life. It was such a silly, foolish thing for him to consider.

Inside I wailed in agony, my gut twisted in pain of knowing what he had been through. James wanted to destroy him, to abolish what we were.

"Look at me, Jacob," I tried again. His eyes were downcast, trails of liquid collecting at the end of his chin. I lifted a thumb, swiping away the drops before they fell, and with a need to console him, leaned my upper torso forward, kissing each trail on his cheeks, "please." He met my eyes, fear evident in the brown irises.

I cupped his warm skin, bathing in the tingle that shot through my body, "You almost killed yourself to keep this from me?" The pain was there, I knew he could hear it. Without speaking a word, his brows furrowed and as if undergoing physical pain, he choked out a howl, wetting the lashes around his eyes as he sobbed helplessly. Not hesitating, I held him to me with one arm secured around his trim waist and a hand fisting his shoulder length locks, pulling his heated body against mine as he unleashed a week's worth of tears.

I rocked him against me, feeling a release so much different from the one we shared moments before. The shaking of his shoulders, the way his nails dug into my back as he finally let go and let me in, hurt too much to witness. If there were tears I could cry, surely they would have been pattering against his heated skin, perhaps even sizzling at the contact. I whispered words into his ear, promising forever with him, assuring him there was nothing to worry about. I wanted to believe this myself, but I couldn't. Everything wasn't okay now. It would take time for me to hold him and for just me to be the one he thinks of intimately. I knew he hated himself for something a monster did to him and he wanted those nights erased from his mind, bleached with the presence of our bond, but it was a skill I lacked.

His body went slack against me after a handful of hours of his emotional breakdown. He was still awake, but all bits of him - mind, emotion and body - were drained. I used that moment to hold him to me like a child or a newly wed bride. No words were exchanged, as I once again carried him home in my arms.

**Jacob**

We were both naked, trees whipping by, a chilling wind feeling good on my overheated skin. I had only broken down like this once. It was our first reunion after I escaped La Push, hoping for the leeches to follow me. It felt like a lifetime ago, but it was no different from now. I stupidly ran away, only to end up in his arms, crying like a baby. And considering the _circumstances_ changed, I didn't. I still feared a life without him. The thought had me nuzzling my nose against the column of his neck, inhaling that awfully sweet smell. He had to come to his senses. There was no way he could easily accept this. I saw that anger, that look that mirrored James when before he would break me in. Edward had to feel what I've done.

"You've done nothing wrong, love." His voice was soothing as he held me close to him. His speed didn't slow as he spoke, "I apologize deeply that you saw me like that. I was...taking it all in."

Maybe a bit of him slipped. Maybe he was holding back. He couldn't still want me after this.

"I want you always."

My hand tightened around his shoulder, "How could you?"

"Because I've loved you since the moment I saw you."

_But James..._

The chill that ran through me when Edward froze was overwhelming. There was a feral growl in his chest, a beast-like muted roar. I trembled, anticipating Edward's arms to move from under me, or for him to sink his teeth into my flesh, sucking the life out of my body. If there was any way to go, I would I have preferred that. I could make up what I had done by giving him a bit of life...

"Please," There was that tone I heard earlier. It was so vulnerable, so human, "Don't think that." He picked up his speed again. We were about a mile away from the Cullen Residence. I could make out the faint noise of a television, some mild conversation and clinking of metal. Everyone was home.

Pressing his lips against the pulse of my neck, Edward ran faster. The noises grew louder. There was the hushed whisper of Alice, a gleeful laugh, "They're here," Before the insides of the large house flew by me in a blur. Before I knew it, I felt the soft mattress of the bed under my back.

Despite my mental condition, I wondered if we were both seen in our nude state. I was rewarded with a small smile from Edward, "Alice covered her eyes and everyone else was in the living room." His outstretched hands pulled from under me, allowing my body to fully fall onto the bed before he backed away as if he was leaving the room.

It was like a stabbing sensation in my gut, "No, Edward!" My throat was still tight and raw from all the crying I done. I held an arm out to him in some odd attempt to keep him in the room. He stopped moving instantly. _Don't leave._ I pleaded.

"I'm not." He whispered, turning, this time using inhuman speed to close the door and come back to the bed. I allowed my body to relax, facing him as he climbed in. Our noses were but an inch from the other. He held my closed fist in one hand while petting my hair, raking it away from my eyes. Tremors took over me as it sunk it that this just might be it. He wasn't angry with me. He didn't resent me.

"I don't." He confirmed, "Ever." His lips felt softer than anything against mine. He pulled back to have full eye contact with me, "He marked you." It was a whisper, but it felt like a deafening roar. Instinctively, I tightened my thighs together, drawing my knees up. He noticed the movement and sighed in what appeared to be despair.

My eyes burned at the thought of not being claimed by him anymore, being claimed by... "A-am I still yours?"

His gaze met mine, and the rope that held me to him, tightened and became as it was; strong and unbreakable, "Always." His cool fingers trailed along my jaw, sliding down the line of my neck, over my shoulders and down my arms. He pulled away from me, but his fingers continued to run down, leaving icy trails in its wake. I gasped, understanding just where they were going.

"No, Edward." I shut my eyes, fending off the images of James sinking his teeth into my flesh.

Edward let out a harsh gasp of his own, stilling his hand for just a moment, "Let me see, love. Please."

I still felt his power over me. Could he still own me, even if I was broken? I obliged, lifting my leg, letting him touch the cool scar just on the inside of my thigh. I opened my eyes, catching the clench in his jaw, the way his eyes darkened in predatory hunger. Knowing I was watching him, he spoke, "Every part of you belongs to me." An unexpected rush of pleasure ran through me, causing an involuntary shudder to rumble my quivering body. Just then, Edward ducked his head. I whimpered, feeling his lips against my navel, before traveling to my hips, bypassing my cock which had responded to his touch instantly. I fisted his hair, unsure of what he had in mind.

"He tasted you." His voice was clouded with a primal fury...and if I was mistaken, desire. I threw my head back, unable to contain the moan when his teeth bit into the mark. The burn was dulled and throbbing along with my pulse. And still, my cock grew at an exponential rate. It was confusing to say the least. How was I getting off on this?

I couldn't help how my hips moved and bucked against the strands of his hair. The burnt red locks tickled along the underside of my sensitive organ as I attempted to muffle a groan with a hand over my mouth. His teeth were still clamped in my flesh, causing my eyes to roll back, but not as how I remember before. This was...pleasure.

"Oh God, Edward!" I yelped out, thrusting upwards into his wild hair. It was overwhelming. I didn't feel this when James bit me and I certainly didn't feel it the night I begged Edward to lose control. What the hell was this? Did something twist and warp in me after being locked up in that moldy building with James? Or was this proof to how desperate I was to be _owned_ by my imprint? The wolf in me howled with submission and need, yet I wasn't sure why this turned me on just as much as feeling him inside me. It was primal and...

So fucking good.

"More." I heard myself moan, working my hips up as he pulled away to lap at my scar before taking another bite.

_I want all of you...need you so much._

I was lost in a trip, I could only compare to when the venom had first took over me. His mouth was on mine. I hadn't heard his voice. I couldn't have.

The tightening in my groin began and I lost control, unleashing a loud moan when a muffled, hungry growl rumbled from his chest.

"Edward!" I cried out just as my chest was coated in spurts of warmth.

_My Everything..._

In my haze, I couldn't decipher whether he spoke or if my mind was playing back to hours before. It didn't matter. He was here with me. I felt the sting of air against my open wound as Edward moved up along my torso, lapping up my release as if it was his true sustenance. I whined, denied his lips for too long. My fingers, still tight around his locks, pulled him so our eyes were level. I gasped in the dark room, seeing a shimmer of gold and forest green swirls in his eyes. He didn't let me observe very long. His lips met mine as he eagerly shared my life force and desire with me. We were lost in each other, holding and gripping as if the world was ending and these were our last moments.

I felt complete again.

**Edward**

"But you just got him."

"I know."

"You can't leave him."

"I'm not."

"He _needs _you."

"And this why I have to do this."

Alice glared at me. I knew she would be against this, merely because she could see what would happen if I went alone.

Carlisle sat to my right, offering his touch in comfort, "Son, are you sure about this?" It was what everyone was thinking. As we sat in the family room, each of us making sure Jacob remained asleep, we spoke in hushed voices. I had explained James abuse to Jacob and was surprised and yet proud to hear the hateful thoughts the members of my family had. None of them appreciated the news.

"I'm coming with you." Emmett offered. It was what I expected to change the outcome of Alice's vision. And I was right. With him at my side, there was a vast difference.

"Emmett, we haven't decided yet." Carlisle spoke up as Rosalie threw a particularly harsh glare his way.

"This _fucker_ deserves to have his dick chopped off and stuffed in his ass. And I'm down to assist," He nodded his head my way, "When do we do this?" The love I had for my brother couldn't have been more right then.

"And what if he has that freak with him?" Rosalie asked.

I had already thought about it, "I don't think that'll be a problem." I informed, looking to Alice who by now seemed put off by my hasty need for action, "It's simple. He can be seen now by Alice. She couldn't see him before."

"I guess that can only mean he's not with her anymore." Esme spoke softly. Ironically enough, she sided with me. Jacob's well-being was her priority and she wanted all ties to his arm eradicated. It was perhaps the first time I caught a violent thought speed through her mind.

The discussion carried on more than I would have liked it to. The question was where were we supposed to look and when and _if_ he was found, what was I to do with James? Question him or go for the kill? All the queries only made my need for a kill greater. Sensing my violent desires, Jasper frowned, honing in a bit too close for my comfort.

_Cut it out!_ I thought viciously, surprised when I saw his eyebrows shoot up. He must've sensed my frustration.

Positioning myself at the end of the sofa, I stared at my alabaster skin, life void under the pale organ. No running blood, just venom and old bones. I was just as he was in molecular make-up and existence, yet the way Jacob reacted to either of us was so...different. When I touched him, I could feel his heart stutter, see just how his pupils dilated. He looked at peace when I held him. But at the thought of James, he stilled, his mind a numbing hum of fear. Jacob was completely wrong. There wasn't a trace of a monster in him. _We_ were the monsters, through and through. My thirst for kill never dies. The burn in my throat will always remain. But the difference between me and James were quite simple. I had Jacob. And with him, a trace of humanity can be found in me.

No matter what we talked over, the choice was left up to me. James would die by my hands. I didn't need answers; I didn't want a clear concise strategy. I just needed him to not exist.

"Do you mind...?" Jasper spoke up, "Do you mind if I came along again?"

There was silence in the room, before all eyes turned to either of us. He was on to me. Whatever spiral I was undergoing, I'm sure he'd provide as a leash, keeping me tethered to the realm of sanity. Somehow, despite it all, I successfully had not lost myself quite yet. But I wanted to, terribly so.

No matter his suspicions. I figured I just may need him.

"Sure, Jasper."

At this, Alice's brow furrowed as she witnessed the exchange. She focused for a brief moment and in her mind's eye, I could see the three of us, back at where I found Jacob.

"You're going to retrace your steps then?" She asked, "And you think you'll find him?"

"I do." I nodded. There was a fog over her vision, "Do you not see him?"

"His choices are unclear." She shook her head, "He may be there, and he may not."

Something suddenly struck me then, "And what about those visions before?" At that, everyone's attention piqued.

Alice's expressions turned sullen as she relayed her visions to those that didn't know, "It seems that whatever agenda this girl has, it's enough to alert the higher ups." At this, Carlisle was at his feet, a new look of business crossing over his features.

"This is not good news." He shook his head, "Why weren't we told this earlier?" He glanced at me, already catching the look that crossed my face.

"Jacob was my only priority then." I informed.

Rosalie snorted, "Jacob was your priority? We're as good as dead if any of them step foot here and _Jacob_, your beloved dog gets priority over all of us."

"Babe," Emmett shook his head, silently willing her to not exacerbate the situation, "It's done."

"It's not Edward's fault." Alice spoke up, "I'm the one that saw this. I should have said something earlier, but with what's been going on..." She didn't need to finish. Something in me constricted and burned at the thought of her endless worry. She was concerned for my life, because I was without him for those days.

In the end, it really was my fault.

Catching this, Rosalie glared my way, "Ever since he stepped foot into this house..." She muttered darkly, "Ironic. Those mongrels are so afraid of _us_, that they had no idea that the trouble had been in their midst all along." At her words, I stood up. Expecting an out lash, both Jasper and Emmett stood as well, separating us with their bodies. But her words were not even a sore mark on my mind. Something she had said had me thinking...

I turned away from Rosalie, stepping out of the family room and outside where I knew I'd get some privacy.

I needed to call Sam.

**Jacob**

The bed somehow felt colder without his presence. I turned over on my side, groaning when my outstretched hand met nothing but blanket and pillow. Curling my body in a fetal position, I attempted to go back to sleep, but it was damn there impossible. Where was he? My hands still searched, until I was sure I was alone. I rolled onto my back, eyes blinking open. How long had I been sleeping? Did he leave to feed, hoping I wouldn't miss him when he was gone?

I attempted to think back to just how I fell asleep. The last day was a blur of emotional and mental stress. The last I could recall was Edward...

I raised myself on my elbows, kicking the thin sheet off my legs, trying to see the evidence of my memories. My heart hammered and jumped in my chest when my eyes landed on my thigh. I bowed my leg to get a better view and felt my breath catch. The mark, a harsh raised scar I resented as much as myself not days before, was now...an oblong shimmer of skin, shades lighter than my own. It was almost a painted design on my soft flesh with the slightest impressions of teeth indentions. I ghosted a hand over it, catching the difference in temperature. But the texture was rough and almost rock-like. As if I was touching a piece of Edward's skin. I played back the episode of the odd scar's origins, feeling my cock lengthen along my upper thigh. There was always something enticing about that unrestrained want Edward had for me. It did more than just turn me on, knowing that the hunger in his eyes was for my flesh and...soul. It was a different yearning, almost a mortal need for air in the way he stared at me. And seeing him sink his teeth into my flesh, staring up at me with those swirling colors of gold and green was all I needed to know I was his.

_Edward_...

My head fell back, landing on the cushion of the pillow under me as images of him took over. I needed him.

"I'm here." I heard him whisper. The bed barely sunk under his weight. One hand, palm up, pressed against my back as he directed my torso toward him until my head was resting on his chest.

"How long was I asleep?" I questioned, feeling my eyes droop at his touch.

"About 5 hours." He whispered against the crown of my head.

"Where were you?"

"Downstairs," His hand cupped my neck and he continued a soft stroke with his fingers, "Sorry I didn't come up sooner. I was on the phone."

I wanted to ask with who, but his fingers felt too heavenly lulling me back to sleep.

"Relax, my love." He cooed, "I'll be here when you wake up." My whole being submitted to his words. I allowed my eyes to close, just as he whispered the last words, I was able to hear, "My existence means nothing without you."

A hazy movie played behind my eyelids. A loving gaze, eyes green and gold against long lashes and ivory skin. Teeth sinking into easily lacerated flesh.

**Edward**

An hour's time and I still felt him in my arms.

Paying no mind to my company, I retraced my steps, following the trail I traveled a week before. It was a journey I would never forget. Holding him, feeling his erratic breath against my shoulder was heaven sent as well as my worst nightmare. The bruises on his flawless skin broke my heart and that fear in him was so palpable. It was what kept him from being under Carlisle's care. It was left up to me to view for any broken or fractured bones. But even then, it was difficult.

As strong as he was physically, he still was as fragile as a human in every other capacity. He needed time to heal from his past, to overcome the demon that tormented his dreams. And it was my job to eradicate any chances of that said demon coming to harm him once again.

We were close. Keeping our senses on guard, all three of us slowed our advances in case anything was waiting for us the last 2 miles ahead. In this speed, Jasper kept to my side as Emmett kept to the rear.

"I heard you." Jasper spoke, keeping pace with me.

I winced. There was no privacy in our home and I'm sure my audience found what I had done quite disturbing. It was hard to translate just what we were feeling then, why the act was so _necessary_. Claiming my mark over the first was more than just a territorial statement, it was an assurance to him that he was completely and wholly my own. "I apologize. Sometimes being with Jacob is unpredictable."

Jasper was silent for a moment, his thoughts taking a rather abashed turn, "I was speaking of your thoughts, Edward." He spoke in a silent hush as if not wanting to arouse Emmett's attention.

My train in thought thrown off, I chanced a glance at Jasper, surprised to see liquid gold glancing into my own, "My thoughts?"

"I can't be sure, but I heard you speak, yet your mouth did not move."

"How is that possible?"

It was still an oddity to see Jasper smile, "Perhaps I'm just mad ?"

"With what has been happening lately, I'm not certain you'd just be the one going insane." Not while I was.

We were silent for the last leg of our travels and I was left to ponder just what was happening. The harder I thought, the more my mind circled back to the night of finding Jacob.

"_Go West"_

It still was an unnerving question in my mind. They allowed him to be found and apparently discontinued ties with James. So was the purpose of James to cripple me or to just let us know the capabilities they possessed? And certainly, if they let Jacob go and directed me to where I could find him, then they had an idea I'd be back for a kill. And if this is what they knew, then naturally they concluded I'd once again leave Jacob out of my care.

But not without supervision.

**Jacob**

I felt it again -the absence of him.

This time I sat up, searching the room. It was dark again. I could hear the hum of a television, voices talking and the occasional click of heels or paper rustling.

And I heard the heavy paws on earth.

And him breathing.

I looked over my shoulder, not surprised, but pretty confused that he was here.

"Edward called me." He seemed to read the look on my face.

"Where did he go?"

"He didn't say," He spoke slowly as if watching his words, "He doesn't want to make the same mistake again."

I considered his answer, swallowing what he was saying. Either Edward was going to feed, or perhaps... I shook my head, but my heart raced anyway. He didn't want me left in just the care of his family, but mine as well.

"You're watching me here?" I questioned.

"No." He said simply, "We're taking you home."

"Why?"

"Because no vampire has touched that territory without us knowing so," He informed, "And we know the land better."

"And he told you to do this."

"He did."

"Sam..."

"Look, Jacob, this _situation_ is troubling for me as well. I'm only taking his commands because I know if I wanted this to be done for Emily, I'd be thankful for the support. "Not paying any mind to my naked body, Sam walked pass where I sat on the bed, towards the window as if making sure everything was clear.

"This is ridiculous." I commented. I was feeling the weight of Edward's decision and the possibilities of our future. It was a tough week to say the least and I needed him more than ever, but there was no reason to get the pack involved in this. They were already involved enough.

"I owe him my life, Jacob." Sam spoke with his back to me, "We all do."

"Shouldn't you be saying that to me?" It was my first attempt at a joke since...

No matter. I still felt too hallow to laugh anyway.

"I am," Sam's lips curled up briefly, "Afterall, he is you." If I hadn't been watching him carefully, I would have been thrown off by his words. But the soft expression and knowing glance my way was enough to let me know this was 'Imprint Speak'. And I understood that language well. A little too well.

"I spoke to Dr. Cullen briefly. He knows where you'll be. With a simple movement of his wrist, he opened the window leading outside and looked over at me, "I just want to warn you, Jacob. Your patience might be tested. We're not letting you out of our sight until he comes back."

Even with the ache of his absence, the comfort of company from the pack softened the blow, "Fantastic."

Grinning at my sarcasm, Sam jumped out first. I followed, letting the night swallow me.

**Edward**

I didn't remember the small shack, yet it was but a mile away from where I held Jacob to me, in the direction I traveled to get to him. The empty, boarded windows let out just a chink of sunlight from the other end of the forest. The house was barren, but the familiar, repulsive scent was there. He was inside. Emmett advanced on my right, keeping his eyes trained on the windows above, where we knew he waited.

_What's the plan? Take him where he stands or hear the pig squeal for a while?_

"His intent is not to speak."

"I figured." A low growl grew in Emmett's chest as he jaw locked in concentration, "Fucker likes pain. I'll be more than happy to give it to him."

Silently, Jasper kept a trained eye before nodding his head my way. We took our first steps toward the vacant, decaying building and just then my feet hung in the air. An image of Jacob stared back at me, contempt and pain in his eyes.

_"I want you, James." His flushed, tanned skin was still unmarred as his eyes flared with anger. This wasn't a fantasy, this was a memory. It was so fresh and real, as if preserved just for my viewing._

_ "What else do you want?" The familiar voice asked calmly. It was laced with venomous glee. He enjoyed this._

_ "For you to," Hesitating, Jacob closed his eyes, as if willing pain away. A pale hand, much like my own, wrapped around his delicate neck. _

I could feel my body roaring with fury.

_"Look at me." The voice ordered. His brown, soulful eyes stared back at him, void of love or the affection I knew would always be reserved for me._

_"For you to fuck me." My love, my life spoke, his voice shaky and aggrieved. _

A crippling blow like none I ever felt before had me doubling over. This was pain. This was hell. The onslaught of images took away every thread of sanity I had left as I buckled to my knees.

"Jacob, God!" I cried out, seeing the hands dig into the human flesh, bruising him, breaking him. The screams, they were...

An agonized cry was torn from my chest as I crumbled to the earth.

**Jacob**

My home looked different from this side of despair. It was more a cage before, something keeping me away from him. A cage with its fucking gate opened. One step out and my world would end, so I remained where I was.

Now, it was just a place that I once called a home; my home _before_ him. There was no sign of a cage, even with the entire pack circling the house. My father greeted me at the door, relief coloring his face. It seemed these days it was Charlie keeping him company for a offspring's absence. I hated that I did this to him, to the entire pack. I wanted to blame myself, but it didn't matter. Things changed. I could tell by the way my father asked me about Edward's whereabouts, as if expecting him to be right behind me when I stepped into the house.

He should have been.

I spent the evening in the confined space with my dad and Sam, eating pizza. And for the first time in weeks, I was smiling genuinely over the irony . Sam's distraction as I nearly lost control, offering pizza to keep me from phasing in the house. It felt like forever ago. The reality was it hadn't even been a year.

Later, in my room, I sat looking out the darkening sky, wondering where he could be and why he would leave me after that happened in such a short time. The ache in my body was already gaining momentum, causing my throat to tighten and burn and my limbs to twitch in the anxious need to phase and find him.

He said he would be there when I woke up.

I shut my eyes fending off the fear of losing him again. Being in my room, on my bed as if it was another night had its comforts and nostalgia, but my heart- my _everything-_ was with him, wherever the hell he was.

I leaned my back against the cool wall, my legs stretched out in front of me as my head fell back. It was harder to keep my mind focused when he wasn't touching me. Nightmares of those lost moments with James haunted me when I was back on the rez. And here it was again, haunting me as I tried to will myself calm. I inhaled shaky breaths and opened my eyes to stare out at the night. It didn't surprise me when I heard the door open.

"Your father's calling it a night." Sam informed, "I thought I'd keep you company."

"Now why would you do that?" I asked, my eyes still taking in the gloomy picture of the grey skies.

"Because you're starting to look like yesterday." He said solemnly.

I sighed, blinking my eyes and turning to face him, "He didn't tell me he was leaving."

Sam nodded, taking careful steps before sitting at the edge of my bed, "I know."

"Did he tell you?" I asked again. There had to be something he said to make Sam agree.

"He wasn't specific, but I have an idea."

"Sam," I pleaded, hoping he'd cave. When he didn't, my chest constricted. I pulled myself to the edge of the bed next to him, feeling the walls close around me in the room. I needed to breathe, to get some air.

"Jacob, where are you going?" Sam questioned from the bed as I stood to my feet.

"I need to get out of here." I didn't get far. Just as my hand touched the doorknob of my door, I felt his hand around my wrist. It was so unfamiliar feeling skin as heated as mine. I missed the cool touch.

"He wants you safe."

I faced him, feeling my features harden at the words, "By not telling me anything?" I pulled my hand away from him, "How does that keep me safe?"

Sam didn't seem fazed by my anger. He merely met my gaze and spoke, "Didn't you do the exact same thing?"

I felt like an idiot, standing there before and speaking to Sam as if I had the high morals here. He was right. I did the exact same thing. And I so easily had forgotten. But I hurt him with hiding, even if it would still hurt him when I was honest. He seemed to handle it well. At least I _think _he did.

"Jacob, I'm not saying he is right. He sees that you've been through enough. We've all seen it."

In a defeated sigh, I took a seat next to Sam, cradling my head in my hands, "Please tell me he's going to be okay."

Whether he was lying or telling the truth, I just needed to hear the words, "He's going to be fine."

**Edward**

Swollen flesh glossed with perspiration, eyes shut in pain as the strangled howls matched my own.

My body burned, every fiber of me. This was worse than tasting him for the first time, worse than him imagining me taking his life. I couldn't understand it. This pain, it felt so...human.

The words were like those under water; so distant and garbled, "Edward!"

I felt rigid, physically more dead than ever, but the insides of me pumped blood, breathed in fresh air, thumped in a pulse. If only for a second. My eyes shot open, seeing Emmett's boyish face strained in worry.

"Holy shit!" He exclaimed, before my vision was clouded by the various expressions on Jacob's face.

It was as if I was hurting him. Me forcing him to say those words. Me destroying him.

"Jazz!" Emmett's voice was but a mile away. But like a switch, the present was with me just as I heard the clash of stone on wood. Helping me up, Emmett faced the source of the noise as I did. On the second floor of the shack was a massive hole, where Jasper stood, eyes darkened and predatory staring at the shambles before us, a huddled form climbing to its feet.

Crimson eyes met mine, before they crinkled at the facial motion of a grin.

**Jacob**

My fingers touched the empty side of the bed before I turned over on my other side. My gut twisted and clenched, knowing he was out there. Sleep came and went, but never lingered long enough for calm to claim me. I was a mess. Not much compared to my last days, but with a weathered soul in his absence, it hurt all the same.

I could hear the movement. Perhaps the boys were making themselves more comfortable outside my window. It was a bit annoying trying to sleep with the panting just on the other side of the wall. I hoped they would at least put _some_ distance between us, but they were under strict orders to keep hawk eyes on me.

My ears perked up at whispered words before my window slid open. I sat up in my bed, ready for Sam. He really was serious about keeping an eye on me.

My heart leapt in my throat when I saw the shimmering pale skin in the moonlight. I was off the bed in an instant, embracing him just as his last foot touched the carpeted floor of my room. My arms tangled around his neck and I kept my nose pressed to his cool throat, tracing his scent, eager to know where he was. He smelled of a sweet smell I could recall...

"Where were you?" I asked him, pressing my lips to his throat before tracing a line to his chin.

His hands were instantly in my hair, tugging eagerly, "Look at me, love." He spoke softly. I did so, pulling back to stare at his face. I gasped, when I saw the haunted look in his eyes.

"Edward..." I was lost trying to decipher just what the fuck happened to him, "What happened?"

**Edward**

_Shouldn't be so complicated_

_Just touch me and then_

_Just touch me again_

_You're breaking me in_

_And this is how we will end_

_With you and me bent _

His eyes searched mine; looking for an answer I knew I couldn't give yet. I needed to know, _yearned _to know we were different. I knew the loving looks Jacob threw in my direction, the way his mind raced to touch me, to complete me, but it still ate at me like a virus.

_He _infected us.

I wanted those hateful stares, those painful cries to be drowned out by his need and love.

He loved _this_ monster.

I couldn't answer him. My lips brushed his in a silent request. He hesitated for only a moment before adding pressure into the kiss. My fingers never left his hair, pulling at the roots, using that as a way to keep him as close as possible.

I needed to know...

"Are you mine?" I pleaded against his lips.

_Answer me love. Please_.

He whimpered against my lips in shock, his lips ceasing movement for a second, before his mind blurred with incoherent questions. Without speaking, he lifted his hand, taking one of mine that still fisted his locks and pulled it away, guiding it between us, down to the curve of his thigh where my mark still scarred his body under his shorts. My being shivered at the texture of the scar.

It was as if a part of me was with him.

With hazy, dark eyes he whispered, "I love you." He was answering my question a hundred fold. Our tongues met in a frenzy greeting, stroking and caressing the other, before Jacob willingly suckled me into the warm cavern of his mouth. I relished the feeling of being surrounded by his body heat.

I needed more.

As if reading my mind, Jacob slowly walked us backwards to his bed. With grace, he circled one hand around my neck, keeping me sealed to him as he lowered his body. I followed, crawling my way up the mattress on my fists before he was fully on his back and I straddled his lap. Our tongues never ceased their greeting.

"I love you with all of me." My voice was raw and in need of confirmation of his affections. I knew affections weren't something he felt too comfortable with, but he didn't hesitate to put me at ease.

"Never leave me?" He sounded just as vulnerable as I not moments before.

I was battling the thought. He was under me; want in his eyes, hands so easily touching me. He didn't wince or grimace. There wasn't a trace of discontent or fear. His eyes spoke a different language. A language I could speak just as fluently.

"Never." My lips pecked his searing flesh, vibrating against his throat when he spoke again.

"Promise me, Edward?" He gripped my head in his hands before pulling me away so he could look at me, "You won't leave me alone like that again."

I covered his hands with my own, "If it is what you wish, I'll stay by your side."

A tender smile crossed his beautiful face, full lips pulling back to reveal white teeth, "Well, you don't have to follow me everywhere." His eyes were bright, as they were before foul hands scarred his heart and body.

I took him that moment, carefully sliding off his loose shorts, carelessly discarding my clothes. My body ached for his warmth, the venom coating the head of my organ making it slick enough to ease into his willing body. In relief, he whimpered, fingers clutching my forearms after I wrapped my arms under his knees and shoulders, fingers pushing back the strands of hair away from his eyes as he kept his gaze with mine.

Whispered words between us, escaladed into trembling moans and groans as my member found refuge in him. Every bit of me hummed as what felt like volts of electricity rushed through me. This was different. Somehow, the bond tightened between us when I began to believe such a thing was impossible. We were connected not only in body and soul, but now in _mind_.

He eased my fears with each cry of my name, each time his hips lifted to meet my thrusts . He didn't know then, but he owned me as well. All of me, monster and human.

His pulsing need fit between us, demanding attention, but his mind was far from relieving himself.

_Stay with me. Stay in me._ He threw his head back against my fingers, flickering his tongue out to catch the digits. My cries were loud enough for curious ears yards away to hear. His heat embodied me, showering me in his fiery caress.

His tongue, his quivering insides.

My body responded, but not as I expected. A hunger took over, my throat drying. A human thirst I had forgotten. A thirst of a desert for water.

Jacob's full lips parted, before nipping my finger. His eyes suggesting just what I yearned to do.

_I want it. _ His puckered lips pulled away as he revealed the flesh to me. The mark I made still evident on the russet surface. The growl of yearning grew in my chest grew with each thrust into him. Without any warning, I pulled myself onto my heels, taking him. He sat on my lap, my member still impaling his trembling body. Jacob kept his head angled away from me, showing me the offering. I cupped his warm cheek, just as our eyes met. I was touched by the desire in his eyes. He enjoyed this part of me, this monster. He wanted to see it, to relish it. The comfort that gave me...

Lifting my hips off of the heels of my feet, I stroked his insides, bringing his attention to our connection, averting it from the impending strike. I was quick, knowing it would be less painful, like a sharp prick. His thighs clenched around mine and I steadied his swaying body with my free arm, circling the small of his back. I suckled his essence from his body, turned on when my name was at the top of his lungs, when the howls of wolves echoed outside, feeling the reverberation of our connection.

My lips locked on his pulse, his insides locked around mine.

That distant moment ago, when I first took him, tasted his essence for the first time. It never struck me that this beast in me would set us free, take his first life, spread an immunity. Something I possessed, that every other creature like me had, that James had, made Jacob and I who we were.

I wasn't _him_. And even though the images haunted me like my own memory, I knew right then that Jacob felt safe in my arms. I had the ability and ease of taking his life and taking his heart and he trusted me with both.

"God, I'm-" _coming!_

I leaned on my knees, lifting off my heels as I picked up the pace. Almost instantly, the bliss of him contracting around me, taking me in deeper was enough for me to know he was ascending to his euphoric state. My lips detached from his wound and I lapped at the broken skin and found my peace in him.

"Did I taste good?" He panted and whimpered softly when I tickled his gland, "Is that what satisfies you, my body and my blood?"

"Jake." I growled, unable to hold off the inevitable.

"If you can have a piece of me, why not the other way around?" He teased, "Let me have you in me, Edward." I lived to give him what he wished for.

With one last thrust, my release coated his insides in consecutive pumps. My body didn't tire, but my being was overwhelmed with the other-thrill of his essence in me. I lowered him onto his back. His eyes were still lidded in desire, but he graced me with an alluring smirk. Like human lovers, we lay next to the other, our minds coming down from the height of our orgasms, hands roaming relentlessly over each other. It was then that the last few hours caught up with me. I had hoped that touching him again would ease any fears and during it had, but my mind replayed the pain I endured.

Seeing Jacob like that. It was worse than 72 hours of venom rushing through my veins, stilling my heart and emptying my lungs of air.

And I couldn't forget what was to come.

I hadn't expected his acceptance at death or his willingness to divulge any form of information. Yet through the pain, James's dead, cold eyes met mine and he revealed what he had done. The war he had started.

The war he was meant to start.

"Enjoy what you have now. Both you and your dog's days are numbered." He sneered right before I rid him of his over-used organ, stuffing it in his mouth. I watched him burn, until I was sure he was gone for good. As much as I wanted to believe it was the end, it was far from over.

I was sure now, with him in my arms that I was one step closer to humanity. I was certain now even as the guilt ate at me that I couldn't save him before, that he trusted me with all he had. I had him as mine, completely and I'd fight to my death to keep it that way as long as possible.

He watched my face in awe, his eyes widening, "Your eyes..." He whispered.

"Are they red?" I asked, aware of the consequence of feeding on human blood. He shook his head slowly, a curious look on his face.

"They're...a fucking beautiful green." He sat up on his elbows, getting a closer look, "I thought I saw this earlier, but it wasn't as...brilliant."

My chest thrummed with an odd sensation, "That can't be possible."

"It is." He cocked his head, "Would you like me to show you?" He asked, not waiting for an answer before he concentrated on mirroring what his eyes saw. I saw myself staring back at him, confusion clouding my expression, but my eyes sparkled a green that I remembered from a life before.

With him, I _really_ did have my humanity.

"My eyes were green when I was human." It was a vague memory, but I could still remember the compliments of such a strong feature.

Jacob sat up next to me, a new look of astonishment on his beautiful face, "Whoa! Do you think-?" He asked with a smile, feeling my skin then flattening his palm against my chest, "Your skin feels a bit warmer but that's it." His tone wasn't laced with disappointment, but wonder, "What do you think that was?"

"I don't know," I shook my head, "It might have something do with why you're immunity to my venom or me tasting you." My new transformation - internal and external - ignited my concern for his health. I stroked the scar on his neck, not surprised to see the wound just as the other on his thigh, "Our connection. It appears to be on every level now."

"Every level?" He asked, following the design of my fingers along his skin until he weaved ours together.

"Yes," I confirmed, "Body, soul - "

"And mind?" He added. I nodded, bringing our clasped hands to my lips, kissing his burning flesh, "Like I could hear you, maybe?" He asked. It was this that had my mind whirring.

The imprint changed a lot between us, but never had it changed the color of my eyes or having my own mind read.

My venom, it changed the construct of his body, making him immune to any other vampire bites. Could that mean that his blood did something to me as well? Overwhelmed with the news of the day, I tried to momentarily focus on one thing at a time.

"I think that'll be something we'll have to talk about with Carlisle," I answered, "As well as something else."

His attention piqued, "Jacob, when I left-"

"I worried about you." He spoke up, not letting me finish, "Sam said that you were trying to keep me safe and I think I get it. I tried to protect you too, to keep you from knowing what happened. I didn't want you to see and suffer with me," His eyes lowered briefly, "The look on your face when I told you. I was sure you'd kill me or... you were pissed as all hell. But it wasn't at me. And as well as you hid the way it hurt you, I could still see it."

"Jake-" He shook his head as a silent gesture that he wasn't done.

"You went looking for him, didn't you? And you saw...what he did?" He lowered his voice into a whisper, "I saw it in your eyes. You looked like shit, like you were going to lose me. You were as scared as I was, weren't you?"

"I was."

His shoulders fell and he avoided my eyes, "I'm so sorry." His voice was hoarse and raw from unshed tears, "He said that he'd get them to kill you. I didn't want to, Edward..."

I quieted him with a gentle kiss, swiping the trail of wetness on his cheek, "I know you didn't want that. I know it hurt you and I swear it felt like I was dying watching it. The pain..." At that his eyes widened, he opened his mouth to apologize and linger on the thought of what I went through, but I couldn't stand seeing him worry, "Shh, but it's over." I tried to assure him.

"No, it isn't." He shook his head knowingly.

"James is gone now and I won't let anything else touch you."

"But Joan and Jean said-"

"Joan and Jean?" I frowned at the mention of the names. They rang a bell.

"They were there with James. They didn't hurt me. Actually, they didn't really like James all that much, but they said they needed him for something."

And like that, everything clicked.

"They want to start a war." I spoke this more to myself as my mind raced. It was all _too_ clear. I remembered the Raven haired girl's words. _"I want to know if your coven are potentials."_

Potentials for a war.

And with Alice's vision, it could only make sense who we were fighting.

"Jacob," This, he needed to know, "I need to tell you about the Volturi."


	2. As If A Dream

**Author's Notes: **Finally back with the second chapter. This was quite a doozy to write, considering that this is the 3rd to last chapter in the series. We're preparing for the battle! It took a lot of self determination to get this sucker out. I'm trying to keep this one up to everyone's standards (mine especially). As usual, this will be quite confusing, but I assure you it all makes sense if you sit and think it over. I suggest reading the **Prologue **to "**Sleep", **before you start this. It's just a hundred words, but that's all you'll need to understand what I have for the second half of this chapter.

I'd like to give a personal thank you to **Lovergyul** for putting a fire under my ass with PM's. I really appreciate it. My mind is so wrapped up in multiple stories, I've been neglecting my special baby. Thanks for reminding me that she needs love too.

And thanks to any reader who has actually stuck with me and this series the last two years (yeah...it's been two years). Okay, on with the story!

**Characters not owned by me**

**xXx**

**Chapter Two: As If A Dream**

**Edward**

_I was a heavy heart to carry_

_My beloved was weighed down_

_My arms around his neck_

_My fingers laced a crown_

"We need to take extra measures. Carlisle suggested a meeting -"

_I was on my knees, legs spread before him. His tongue explored the most intimate crevices of my body. _

"A meeting?"

I frowned, attempting to blink away the imagery, "We need to share some key factors in slaying vampires. This will be different than the others. The Volturi has quite a bit of vampires with special skills. If we can maneuver as a team, deflect their skills with ours -"

_He was stretching me, filling me to the hilt. It was all fire - pain and heat. He was a ferocious beast, claiming me with hands on my hips._

"Edward?" Sam watched me with concern, "Is something the matter?" I was supposed to be informing the alpha of what was to come. It was important that I passed the message after confirming that they were indeed coming. We had little time and it didn't help that I was distracted.

"Yes. Fine." My voice was huskier than I expected. A low, feral growl grew in my chest, causing Sam to raise an eyebrow. It was something to see him respond in amusement rather than hostility. A lot had changed in such a short time, "Excuse me for a moment." I requested, not waiting for an answer. I was on my feet instantly, running through the cramped space of the house until I was inside his room. There he sat, on the bed, legs wide and arms as anchors.

"When you talk business, it turns me on." He smirked. My body hummed at the scent of his arousal.

"Jacob, you can't interrupt me while I'm speaking to Sam. He needs to know-"

Jacob rolled his eyes, "He'll do it. You saved his life."

"Actually, I didn't-"

"Shh." He cooed, biting swollen lips. My mouth literally watered with venom, "I've never fucked _you_ in my room before, Edward."

"You do realize your alpha is within earshot." I couldn't help smiling. He was in no way over the events that had transpired just recently, but each day a bit of his old self was unraveled; Jacob, smirking when life altering events were right around the corner.

"A good Werepire Fucking 101 would do him some good." He snickered, before getting up to pull me by the collar of the shirt, "Now c'mere." Our lips met in a heated, desperate kiss. If there was one thing that had changed between us, it was the frantic, almost painful need when we touched. Things were rarely ever sensual and slow, not when I nearly lost him more times than I wanted to count. I followed him as he fell back onto the bed, allowing my arms to climb up the mattress until he was fully on his back. His legs locked around my lower back as he bucked his hardness against my stomach.

"Your father-" I tried to bring some sense into what we were doing, but his tongue was quicker, coating my mouth with heated wetness, "Jacob-"

"Fine," He growled, "You can fuck _me_ then." He was already frantically pulling on my jeans, attempting to unbutton them.

"We have important matters to handle." I attempted weakly, kissing him back with as much fervor, "We can't do this now."

"Would you deny me this, Edward?" For good measure, he lifted his hips again. I couldn't help the hungry cry. I had to keep myself in check. They weren't aware I had bitten him in our recent love-making and I wasn't sure there was enough tolerance and trust to test what they'd do if I did it in the close proximity of Sam.

"Never." I said without hesitation.

"Alright then." That seemed to be the answer he was fishing for, "Now shut up and fuck me. The sooner it's over, the sooner you can get to business." I answered with, a snarl of desire escaped me and the world was briefly forgotten as I ripped what was left off on his body. He responded with a husky chuckle, pressing his lips along my neck and collar bone before roughly nipping me. It was an exhilarating rush. Our intimacy was becoming a burning, destructive flame that was beginning to get harder and harder to control and extinguish. We were rough on occasion and there was my thirst to taste him whenever I inhaled his scent. An urging desire to have his pulsing life in me as I impaled him. In fact, it had been awhile since he claimed me as his own, as if he was willingly submitting himself to me.

My entire being shuddered at his racing thoughts, vivid imagery of our bodies entwined and writhing in implosive lust driven passion. I had never felt my body tremble so violently in all my existence than when I was with him and I didn't need to wait. Our heightened arousal and connection had me straining and leaking profusely against his stomach. I swiftly pulled back, aligning myself with his body before entering his warmth.

"Fuck." Jacob panted and for that small moment, I heard his vulnerability, saw the fleeting images of James taking him so carelessly. They were gone as quickly as they came, but I still felt the burning rage against the monster that hurt him. It was a scar that would forever mar such a perfect and innocent soul.

"I love you with everything I am." I needed him to know, _existed_ for him to know. And we lived an eternity in that small reserved time.

"Need you..." He whimpered, all cocky, playful banter lost in our interlocking intimacy. My pace was quick and rough, jerking the bed recklessly against the wall. I couldn't care less who heard. I caught the sigh of annoyance from Sam in the next room and heard the distant rumble of an engine from a mile away; Jacob's father was on his way. I got lost again, tasting his skin, my mouth pooling at the thought of how I could bring us to our ultimate highs. I'd never known an orgasm so intense than when I took him and marked him simultaneously. Instead of the bliss of his submitting flesh to my teeth, I leaned in, inhaling his scent and capturing his lips with mine.

_I'm close_. His whimpering pants wouldn't allow him to speak these words aloud.

_As am I, love._ I heard the words reverberating back to me from his mind and it was overwhelmingly intense. As if on cue, we both met our release at the precipice of sanity. I curled into his body, letting the human reaction take over, a witness to this heavenly delight. My heart, I could have sworn strummed and swelled at the completeness I felt. He was here in my arms, physically healthy and loving me, monster and all.

Jacob's skin glimmered in sheen of sweat, his head thrown back against the pillow. I watched in wonder. He was a beautiful soul with an art of flesh. His dark eyes were hidden by a thin veil of skin as he chuckled to himself.

"Shit." He grumbled, "I have no control when we're under the same roof."

I laughed at the irony. My senses were finally alert to the outside world. Sighing, I pulled myself out of his tender body. I suddenly felt guilty for my lack of restraint during a serious message delivery, "Sam is outside welcoming your father back. He's planning to give you a good scolding."

Jacob was unperturbed, "Nothing like the one you just gave me." He snickered. His fingers tickled along my skin, teasing and promising. He finally sat up, groaning slightly in pain. I felt my eyes widen as I took in the bruises along his hip. I hadn't realized I was holding him so tightly, "Don't say it." Jacob spoke before I could express my concerns.

"Love, you should tell me when I hurt you."

He shrugged, "I liked it. I love the way you are with me." He spoke without doubt. His eyes were expressive and spoke more than his words could allow, "I trust you, so please trust me enough to let you know if we go too far." I owed him that at least, I knew. I nodded, but it didn't keep me from tenderly brushing my fingers along the discolored flesh.

"Give it a few minutes and I'll be as good as new." He smirked up at me. I nodded again, not trusting my words, "I guess we should get dressed. Dad's still a bit uncomfortable with the knowledge that we fuck like rabbits."

"Alright." We both redressed silently. Jacob had to find a new pair of jeans, considering the shreds I torn his old pair into. We had observed the state of the bed. It was worse off than it had been before. Our lost moment together had created quite a dent in the mattress as well as provided some damage to the thin walls of his room.

"Well," Jacob sighed, "It's not like I'm here all the time, anyway." He threw me a small smile. "You're going to promise me to behave now, aren't you?"

"I planned on requesting you keep your thoughts _less_ explicit for the next 2 hours or so, yes." I nodded, but couldn't help the contagious smile that spread on my lips. I cupped his cheek silently urging him closer. It was a soft, tender kiss we shared, one I needed dearly for the moment. The anxiety of our future was already weighing on me. I had not spoken much of it with Jacob. I was fearful to accept that there was a possibility of losing him just when I had him. I knew that Jacob's importance to me was a vulnerability and I knew that it was unwise to act as I would have before. If a war was coming, Jacob would fight at my request against it or not. My plan from there on was to figure out just how I'd be able to protect him without being obvious to the wrong observer.

"Edward?" Jacob questioned, his mind littered with worried thoughts.

"Shh," I silenced his worries with another kiss, "I'll finish delivering my message to Sam and we shall go home. Alice is eager to take you out."

It was a good distraction. Jacob grumbled and rolled his eyes, "Great," with a shrug, he turned towards the door, "I hear my dad. He must be back from Charlie's." I was thankful he couldn't see the frown that graced my face. Indeed, his father was back from Charlie's - with bad news.

**Jacob**

"Dad," I greeted as Sam helped him out of Harry's old truck, "Hey Sue." I waved to Harry's wife. She gave me a nod and a small grin.

"You look healthy and good. That's great to see, Jacob." She spoke cryptically. I didn't know what to make of the comment. I could tell she was genuine in her words, but I wondered if there was something wrong.

"Seth and Leah still patrolling tonight?" I asked, hoping that they were okay.

"Oh yes." She nodded, "Seth misses you by the way." I sighed, feeling the guilt creep up on me. I hadn't gotten much time alone from Edward these last few days. Seth had been understanding, but I knew he had kind of a hero's admirence for me and he really did enjoy the company of Edward. He was much more understanding about my relationship with Edward than even my father. I owed him my company in the future, that's if everything was fine after this storm was over.

"I'll be sure to stop by some time."

My dad grumbled a farewell to her before she drove off. Something about him seemed off. Sam appeared in the know about whatever the hell was going on. He gave my father a comforting pat on the shoulder before turning back into the house where Edward waited to finish talking to him.

"What's going on?" I didn't even give my father a chance to steel himself and pretend things were fine as he usually tended to do.

He sighed, already giving up, "Charlie received a call yesterday."

"Okay." I nodded. My mind raced with questions. Were they finding murdered people, evidence that Jean and Joan were still in the area?

"Bella went missing a month ago. Her mother and step father were found dead in their home, but there was no trace of her. Charlie got the call last night."

I was taken aback by the mention of Bella. I hadn't thought about her in months. "Wait, wait." I threw up my hands, "That's insane. How did she-? No, why would he find this out now?"

"The bodies were not found until a week ago, but judging by the decay of the corpses, they estimated they had been dead for at least a month and it had been 4 weeks since anyone had seen Bella."

Something in my gut fell. This was...impossible. Bella was _just _here. I saw her before she left. She had been upset about something. From what Charlie had said, she wasn't happy there and school was proving to be difficult for her. She wasn't even in Forks for a week before she left, but I still got to talk to her. We had been friends once... and we could have been closer if she stayed. To think she had been missing all this time when I was going through my own shit. I considered what could have happened if she stayed, if she and I became friends...

I was lost in my thoughts when my father spoke again, "Charlie is flying down to Florida tonight to speak with the detective in charge of the case. There may be something he could do to help, we hope."

"Right." I nodded, feeling my gut twist and pull.

I hadn't known Bella as well as I'd hoped to. She was a distant family friend from the past, but I still felt that distant ache of affection. I hoped she was safe.

**Edward**

_I was a heavy heart to carry_

_My feet dragged across the ground_

_And he took me to the river_

_Where he slowly let me drown_

"Do you want to talk about it?"

He shook his head.

"It might feel better if you do."

I felt his warm breath against my chest as he sighed. I should have known Alice's plans. She kept it well hidden from me. She was able to see how Jacob would receive the news. It was for that very reason she made plans to cheer him up. It went over my head, apparently and it did very little to lift his spirits.

"It's weird." He commented. He hadn't said anything when he entered the room. He didn't utter a word as he undressed and climbed in bed with me, laying his head on my chest. I had been reading a journal Carlisle had given me earlier that day. It was everything he gathered from his time with the Volturi all those years ago and it was quite helpful now. But once again the inevitable war was put on hold as I placed the book face down, my attention solely on him.

"What is?"

He lifted his head, his eyes meeting mine, "Bella missing. I don't understand." He shook his head, "It feels like a dream. Everything does; as if it wasn't meant to happen." That had taken me by surprise and cut deep somehow. It hurt me immensely and I couldn't understand why.

"I was meant to be yours and you were meant to be mine." I knew I shouldn't have taken his words to heart. He was in pain and still recovering from James, yet it left an impression on my mind. I hadn't told him what the raven-haired vampire said to me. There was another path. I hadn't questioned that alternate universe where he was like a brother. I detested it. How could I have him within my reach and not touch him? How could I say I love him and not express it with a kiss or a moment inside him? And the irony to this was that although he knew nothing of what I knew, he still questioned our reality.

"That's not what I meant, Edward." He read the hurt in my eyes. Fingering my lips deftly, he spoke, "Everything is happening too fast. The changes between us, the pack. All of a sudden there's this vampire royal family that keeps you in line with laws and we have to fight them. And now, something so...normal, so human worldly and it's just as horrific. Someone killed her family and took her or she ran and...what if she's alive and scared and alone." His eyes wandered as he continued to ponder silently.

"Were you close?"

"Not really. She used to come out here every once in a while and we were close then, but after that we lost contact. I didn't really know much about her as a teenager." He frowned to himself, keeping the picture of her out of his mind. She was a blur. No face, no eyes. It was if she couldn't be willed into existence. As if he didn't want her to.

We lay together, silent and pensive until finally he gave into sleep. I had no relief from my thoughts as he did. There were a recipe of fear, worry and a desire to make him as he was before the world crumbled from where he stood. My thoughts also drifted to Alice and her elusive manner of keeping me out of the loop of what was to come to today. The only news I had ever received for the changing plans of when the Volturi would come and with whom. It changed nearly every day. There was no way to be sure, so the best thing that was possible was to prepare now.

It was Carlisle's plan to invite the pack over for dinner the next night to arrange a meeting and focus on just what was to be done with our shared enemies. Sam agreed without hesitation. Jacob was accurate in his belief that Sam was ever grateful. It was hard to decipher if Jacob's father was. He kept his mind expertly clear only grunting a hello my way when he noticed I was a guest in their home. There was no resentment in the way he viewed me when we exchanged greetings, yet there was hesitance. Years of legends told were hard to forget. It was Carlisle's desire to invite him and the remaining elders as well to the dinner, but the tension was not entirely gone within their group.

Pressing a gentle kiss against the temple of Jacob, I slipped from his embrace only to momentarily excuse myself to speak to my sister. If there was anything else I needed to know regarding Jacob's state of mind, it was important that I exchanged a few words with her first. She expected me. Her small frame was seated on the couch in her room, a guarded look about her.

Jasper was nowhere to be found.

"Alice," I spoke slowly, "Do I have to ask?"

"Well, yes you do. I know you have questions, but I am still unclear in how you're going to ask and just _what_ you'll ask first."

"Why didn't you say anything to me?"

She nodded as if satisfied with the question, "You two were clearly enjoying your reunion and I'm sorry if I couldn't bring myself to ruin it. He needed to recuperate. We all do." She said solemnly, "And it didn't matter if I told you or not. It would still bother him in the end, Edward. It was better you both found out at the same time than you know before him. You would have worried yourself silly."

"It's important that I know anything and everything that has to do with him. You know that."

"I do." She nodded, "But what does it matter? There's nothing about it you can control now."

"Now?"

She was preparing herself for something, "Bella. She was someone you knew."

"What do you mean, Alice?"

**Jacob**

"Another dinner roll?" Esme seemed to be enjoying herself too much.

"Sure!" Seth perked up, grabbing three and throwing it on his plate.

"She said _'another one'_, Seth. Not three." Quil snickered, tucking into his turkey.

"That's quite alright. I have more dinner rolls in the oven for you boys."

"Thank God!" Embry sighed, "This is like crack. I'm almost certain you put crack in it." He gave her a searching look, "You did, didn't you?"

I snorted. This was turning out to be more of a buffet than a normal dinner. The table was loaded with food. Esme and Alice really went all out. Mashed potatoes, three turkeys, sweet corn soufflé, macaroni and cheese, greens and a load of other things.

"They're baked in honey and butter?" Esme answered as if asking if that's what Embry meant by 'crack'. Seth and I had to refrain from laughing.

"Did everything turn out as good as the dinner rolls?" Carlisle asked us, "Esme was in the kitchen for most of yesterday and today and she won't say, but she's eager to know if everything came out alright." It was only him, Esme and Edward that joined us at the table for dinner. And thankfully the only guests for dinner were Sam, Embry, Quil and Seth. Sam made it an effort to bring those who were actually _willing_ to go and would keep the peace. Carlisle and Esme seemed to be making their own efforts as well. Besides providing a meal to feed a village, they sent Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper and Alice on a planned trip to Seattle for some art show. Alice, of course, was crestfallen about not staying to talk with the pack, but from what I heard; Esme wanted Alice to "Enjoy yourself while you still can." I wasn't sure what to make of that.

"Everything tastes great. Thank you. You really didn't need to go through the trouble."

"Seriously." I agreed, "10 large pizzas and a few liters of soda would have been good."

"But not as good!" Seth spoke with a mouthful of dinner roll.

"That's good to hear, boys." Esme looked completely flattered and excited to treat some guests. It was actually nice to see others besides me eating in the house. It was just too odd to have food in the fridge that no one but me ate. Edward sat silently next to me, his hand holding mine in my lap. We hadn't spoken much since our conversation the night before. Correction, _he_ wasn't speaking. It was as if my mood had somehow transferred to him. He became withdrawn, standing in front of the wall length windows staring out as if lost in thought. Every once in a while to let me know he wasn't a statue, he'd turn to meet my gaze, knowing I was watching in worry. He wouldn't say anything, but the look in his eyes was unnerving. I wouldn't say I was over the news about Bella, but I personally handled the news better than Edward did considering the thought that he didn't even know her.

After everyone pretty much devoured the food, everyone sat back burping and groaning from the lack of ability to move. Esme seemed too pleased. Taking the cue, Carlisle began getting to business. With full stomachs and trust in their hosts, everyone was too eager listen to what I had informed of a few days before.

"So you're telling me they're like some _vampire_ government?"

"Well, there are consequences for certain actions, I assure you. The Volturi are a force not to be reckoned with if you do not know how they operate and if you're not well equipped with your own army yourself."

"_Army._" Sam uttered the key word, "Is this what we'll have to make?" Even in his Alpha stoicism, he looked concerned. He had the right to be. From what I knew, The Volturi had a gang of specially gifted vampires and were eager for recruits.

"That's why I ask of your company today. It's imperative that we be prepared when they have arrived - for anything. I've known tightly woven power for over a century and they work for two reason only; for their benefit and against a threat."

"So we prepare." Sam nodded, "We'd have to learn as much as we can about these Volturi. I'm sure you'll be able to provide the information."

"Of course." The conversation continued and I lost interest. This was getting beyond irritating and tiring. I wanted so much for this to end, for everything to just be simple. I wanted to relax, go back to school, live a normal life with Edward.

Well as normal as it could get.

"I'll get the dishes, Esme." Edward finally spoke quietly.

"Nonsense." She waved her hands, but he was already rising. I moved my hand from his lap, but he didn't seem to forget me. He turned, leaning over me before pressing his lips against mine. I couldn't help the moan that escaped me. It felt like forever since we kissed. He pulled away, but I followed, raising in my seat slightly and pressed eagerly into his kiss. He pulled away finally, a gentle smile on his face before grabbing my plate and a few others. My heart hummed at the brief contact. Whatever was going through his head, I needed to know. Why did what I tell him last night bother him so much? He couldn't have been jealous, could he? Bella was a friend I knew and no matter if we were close now or not, it was impossible for it _not_ to affect me. I'd have to be cold hearted to be indifferent about it.

I cleared my mind, facing forward and was greeted with three sets of eyes watching me with a mix of awe and embarrassment. I forgot I had an audience.

"I'll help." I said to Esme, grabbing a few dishes blindly before rising in my seat and following Edward's lead into the kitchen. He was clearing the last of the food off the plates before rinsing them off in the sink, "Hey." I greeted him.

"Hi, love." He replied in kind. He was always so soft spoken. I rolled my eyes at the thought and he smiled, "I'd be fine putting away the dishes myself." He spoke.

"I know you're all vampire quickness, but it's okay to have some help once in a while." I shrugged, grabbing a plate and cleaning it off, "Plus, I wanted to ask you a question about last night."

"They're still talking outside. Carlisle would be able to answer any questions you have."

"I think I had enough conversations about the Volturi."

"Perhaps-"

"Edward." I snapped, "Why are you avoiding talking about this?"

"I understand it still bothers you - her disappearance. I'm here if you need to talk."

"No. _I'm_ here if you need to talk. Which you haven't by the way." Edward was doing that thing again. That thing I hate. I thought we've been through enough that he wouldn't hide-

"I knew her." He belted out.

"Who?"

"Bella." He looked to me with wounded eyes, "I knew her and I didn't know."

I frowned, not sure what the hell was going on, "But how?"

He stood stone still, his back now to me, "Before I met you, she came to Forks High. She was...a temptation for me."

"I don't understand..."

"When I smelled her blood, I had this urge to kill her. It was overwhelming and yet I wanted nothing more than to do it. I didn't care about consequence or who would have seen. But I did care about what I'd be doing to my family. So I refrained.

She was an enigma. I knew not what to make of her because I couldn't read her thoughts."

"Wait, what?" The words were a jumbled mess in my head. This whole damn month wasn't fitting in my long term memory. I don't think I could get it to. He knew Bella? He had been tempted to kill her? He couldn't read her thoughts? I stared at Edward, unsure of what to make of it. He watched me with cautious eyes as if expecting me to attack him. After being able to digest a bit of what he said, I asked, "Were you the reason she left?"

"Possibly." He shrugged, "I wouldn't know, but she didn't seem happy here. I watched her. I was intrigued by her, but I wanted _nothing_ to do with her."

"Why?" A bit of me was relieved that he kept himself away. For her sake or mine, I couldn't decipher yet.

"I thought temptation would win. I even thought of leaving for a year, going back to Alaska, but by that time she left."

I let out a relieved sigh. I wasn't sure why it felt like something lifted from my shoulders, "Is that what you've been hiding? Why didn't you tell me that sooner? If you knew her, then maybe-"

"I didn't know her name."

"How could you not know her name?"

"It wasn't important to remember after I met you, Jacob. It was as if she didn't exist." He spoke gently. My chest panged in want at his words, but he ruined it by speaking again, "It was Alice that told me her name. And it was Alice that explained what she could have been."

"_Could have..."_

_ "_She had had visions when I first met Bella. She shared one with me; that I would kill her. The other she didn't," He spoke lowly, "She said that Bella and I could have become close, had a relationship."

"A relationship." It was as if waves of fears were crashing on the shores of my thoughts. What do I feel with this, _how_ should I feel with Bella? She was missing and yet jealousy rushed to the surface of my mind. What if they had been lovers and somehow I'd seen Edward through my friendship with Bella and imprinted? What if...?

And to think I wondered what would have happened if Bella stayed. I let out a humorless laugh, "Great. I was your second choice."

"You have always been my _first_ choice, Jacob." He said vehemently.

"But Alice said she had a vision."

"Alice's visions are based on choices." Edward spoke silently, "I didn't choose her."

"But you could have." And if Charlie was to ever find Bella. I pictured Edward seeing her, falling for her and leaving me. The idea hurt so much, I wasn't sure I'd survive the real thing.

"Stop that, please." Edward begged.

But I couldn't, "You could've loved her."

"You know our choices are what make us. In the end, I didn't choose her. And I was right to, something better came along."

"How would you know that?" I exclaimed, "How would you know what you would've had with her?"

"Because I didn't see forever with her! I didn't fall in love with her the moment I was in her presence. I didn't give in to _temptation_!" He finally unleashed it. We both seemed taken back by his words. I could see it right in his eyes. He doubted his choice too. He hadn't been sure if this was better, "What that nomad vampire said to me after I bit you, she told me there was another path for us. That we would have been enemies, friends, then brothers. She told me this wasn't our original path. Something changed." I felt my gut twist tighter in fear. My world was shaking, vibrating. I was seeing red.

I was going to phase. And soon.

"Love." He raced over, holding my arms at my sides, "Love, listen to me. She couldn't see our path. She couldn't see you. She couldn't see what we would be able to do. Our essence made immunity; your blood literally gives me humanity. We're tied deeper than any imprinting. It literally shows physically between us. I chose you because I was supposed to. This fate _is_ us. I love you." His hands stroked my arms, but he kept me steady. The heat was slowly ebbing away, my shakes finally dying down.

"If there would have been any love for Bella, it would have been derived from the temptation of her blood, the curiosity to get in her head. I felt no pull, no desire to be near her as I do with you."

"But what if you had and we met. I could have imprinted on you-"

"It wouldn't have mattered. Alice wouldn't have been able to see you coming." Then he surprised me with a crooked grin, "Let's say something would have happened between Bella and I. A different world. Who's to say I wouldn't have fallen for you after? Remember I loved you before you've ever imprinted on me."

I narrowed my eyes. His words were working, but there still was that nagging jealousy, "You could have chosen to love her instead of me."

"I'd have to be void of substance and sight for that to happen, love." He pulled me to him in an embracive kiss, "I'm yours and it was supposed to be this way."

**Edward**

_My love has concrete feet, my love's an iron ball_

_Wrapped around your ankles, over the waterfall_

"Yours." I whispered into his ear. He grunted from above. His heat pulsed in me and I swallowed him with need. My knee pressed into my chest as he tightened his arm under my thigh. His arousal sunk in deeper and I shuddered, "I'm always yours." His wet muscle penetrated, seeking my tongue, demanding another connection. His hip picked up again. Our rhythm was slow and sensual, nothing like our previous days of untamed burning desire. Alice's revelation had us both shaken and doubtful. It was one thing to be told of a possible path from a possible enemy, but hearing Alice say to me that she had visions of Bella turned and with me was bewildering. She showed me. It was as if she was showing two strangers together. Their body language so mechanical, nothing as intense as what I had with Jacob now. Yet, I still thought...

What would it have been like? Even if I wouldn't have traded Jacob for the world, I was still curious of that different path. I had gotten lost in it, thinking of a life with a human girl. How would she have changed? Would I have slipped and given in? Would it have been like Jacob, a moment of intimacy? Could that even be possible with a human? I would get so wound in that world that when I occasionally came back, I'd see him and thank whatever creator there was out there that it was this world I had. I didn't want him to know, because I didn't want him to think that world was a threat to ours. I didn't want him to feel less than what he was - everything I lived for.

"Say it again, baby." His breath panted against my lips and I moaned in need.

"Yours." I could scream it for however long he wanted, "Always yours." I was able to feel just about every inch of him in this position.

We came together, panting and pulsing inneed before his body, a flesh embodied inferno, collapsed next to me. It was a moment of transcending emotion. I felt the waves of Jacob's thoughts wash over me and my body shuddered in my post-euphoric state. As if by a domino effect, his did as well and then, I heard it. I turned, embracing him in my arms, feeling his body curl into me.

"Love," I whispered as gently as I could, "Tell me, what's wrong?" He didn't speak. I'm sure if he tried, he wouldn't have been able to. It took some time for Jacob to catch his breath and gather his thoughts. I waited and I kept tabs on what he was preparing himself to say. I was fearful for my life.

"I can't do this anymore." His voice croaked and my world stopped.

"What, love?" I whispered, "Can't do what?" _Please, please._

My Everything lifted his head, eyes meeting mine. They were glossy and his cheeks were wet, but he was oblivious to it, "I can't keep myself together. I can't...keep losing you like this."

"You're not losing me."

"No, but it feels like it. Every moment feels like..." He sighed, "I'm sorry. It's just with everything-"

"I know." I knew with all that I was what was going on. I fingered his cheek, gathering the wetness there, "I felt like I was dying."

"Dying?" Jacob pulled away, his skin glistening in his release and sweat.

"When we found James...I don't think I've ever...turning didn't destroy me as much as seeing what he had done to you."

"Edward," Jacob took my cheek with his hand, pressing his palm gently against it, "Tell me."

**Jacob**

Something changed. I couldn't put my finger on it, but I knew this for sure, everything came to a head. I didn't usually cry.

Or ever.

But after the mind blowing sex and the confession in the kitchen, it was as if the world inside me imploded. For someone who was taken by surprise, Edward handled it like a professional. In fact, by doing that, I was able to see his weaker side as well. It was as if he was giving me something back. I wasn't the only one that felt scared, constantly stressed the fuck out and concerned that Edward would be grabbed from me. Because he definitely could be, considering the vampires that kidnapped my ass.

Staring at the clear field, I was now aware of what Edward experienced the night he disappeared to kill James.

_"He was inside my head, terrorizing me with images, memories of you. He _knew_ I couldn't save you, that I didn't. He knew he had a part of you. He had pride that he took a bit of you away from me._ _It drove me mad."_

_ "What did you do?"_

_ "I took a piece of him."_

The plan was set and the meeting had begun. The whole pack and the whole Cullen coven. One, big happy family.

If I had been paying attention the night before, I would have known that Carlisle scheduled a meeting with the entire pack to meet up between the treaty lines - a clear, wide field - where I sat in serene silence and watched. There was a tension between vampires and wolves, but nothing as it could have been without Jasper in company.

Before the pack went home after the dinner the previous night and before Edward and I ventured upstairs to seal the deal about just who he belonged to, Sam met me outside, a grim look on his face.

"Carlisle told me that there's a chance these...other vampires might fight with us."

"It's what Edward has pieced together. They implied it to both of us."

"I don't trust them."

"Neither do I, but what are we supposed to do?"

Sam thought for a second, "In these recent weeks, there have been more of us coming to."

"..._What?"_

"There's more of us."

"Since when?"

"Since you left, came back and died. I've hidden it with reason that I'd need them to kill the Cullen family if anything happened to you, but seeing how that would never be the case..." Sam sighed, "You weren't to know about it because you are close to Edward, but it shouldn't matter now because they are our ally. These nomad vampires aren't. "

"So you're going to keep them hidden-"

"Just in case we need to act."

I took deep inhales, trying to reign in the overflow of information as I sat and stared ahead blindly. I heard Carlisle speaking in smooth, deep authority. I could make out Embry's and Quil's voices as they asked questions, but I wasn't all there. I couldn't be, not until I grasped just what the hell was going on.

Sam had asked if I was alright that night, patting my shoulder in comfort. The argument I had with Edward was loud, so I'm sure the whole house heard. It might have made no sense to them though, not many of the pack knew just how Alice's powers worked, but judging by my shaky stance and partial attention, Sam knew I was on the edge. It was Imprint Speak all over again. He had assured me that Edward would stick by me.

"You didn't see everything that happened when he came on our land. It was an eye opener."

"Love?" My thoughts were distracted, catching sight of Edward. I hadn't moved from my spot on the ground and judging by all the phased wolves filling the clearing, I appeared to have missed a chunk of what was going on.

"Yes." I answered, not quite there. My mind was a blur of Bella, Sam, Edward and James. I couldn't keep my thoughts out of my reality.

Edward, in all his glorious beauty frowned in concern. It was a bit annoying that he could live in my head as much as I could, "Are you alright?"

"Overwhelmed." I shrugged, "Did I miss anything?"

Edward didn't answer, but I could see that obviously I must have, "Alice updated everyone about what she has been seeing these last few hours. It appears the Volturi have made up their minds. They are coming in 3 days."

"Why the deadline?"

"It appears they want to act as soon as possible, but are unsure what would be waiting for them here, so clearly they are doing their research."

I sighed in frustration. Great, we didn't have much time to get our gear together. I stared ahead in thought, watching as Carlisle described the techniques of fighting when it came to older, smarter vampires. The pack watched silently, sitting on their haunches as Carlisle fought against a quite graceful and powerful opponent - Jasper.

I was brought back from my mind again, feeling a thumb swipe over my cheekbone, "Love, come back to me."

"I'm here." I nodded, staring up at him, "I think I should join the others. Soak in the lesson." I made to sit up ,but Edward kept me from moving.

"You don't have to."

"I think if I want to take down a few leeches, I need to hone my skills." I joked lightly, but was surprised to see heavy concern marring his face, "What is it?"

"You don't have to fight. We can leave-"

"Edward." I warned. I didn't need to finish. I loved him with everything that I had, but this was about more than just our current safety. It was about our family and pack. It was about making sure we didn't have to face losing each other in the future. I had a feeling running away would not only be pathetic, but would earn us quite a hunt.

He seemed to be searching my mind for doubt before he answered, "If this is what you wish."

"Isn't this what you want, Edward?"

"I'm only thinking of you."

I sighed, "I'll think about everyone else for us, then."

He gave me an adoring smile before speaking again, "I need you as safe as you can be. This is going to be a good lesson."

I snorted, standing on my feet, patting grass off my cut-offs, "I think I can take you." I teased.

The smile on his lips widened, but the worry was still in his eyes. Hell, we needed a vacation.

"Carlisle!" Alice yelled, cutting off the demonstration in the field, "They're here!"

"The Volturi?" I felt my heart thump in my chest. Fuck, we weren't ready yet. We didn't know much about their strategy or hell, knew who would be coming.

"No." Edward frowned.

**Edward**

I could see the images, blurs taking shape, forming into raven hair, blood-red eyes. There were 5 figures forming behind her, gaining features on faces and sculpting in body. It wasn't the Volturi, "It's the coven. There are six of them."

"Six?" Jacob was confused. As was I. It appeared we had only ever seen two of them - Joan and Jean. I was curious and yet anxious to meet the other four.

"They're here!" Alice yelped again. We all waited in the clearing, forming together in a semi-circle, wolves and vampires as partners. I shielded Jacob with my body, watching the clearing. Their scents hit us first, before we could make out their forms between the trees. It was the raven haired girl that stepped out first, followed by the petite blonde.

"Edward." The raven-haired nomad Jacob labeled as Jean spoke, "You've been expecting our company." Her eyes trailed over everyone present, before landing on me, then Jacob.

"I have." I blocked him from her view.

_Edward, _Alice spoke, _look._ I glanced over Jean's shoulder taking in the three males and the only female I hadn't seen -

Jacob recognized her quicker than I did. There was surprise, fury, but above all else, there was fear. She stared back at him, red eyes flickering along his body as if attempting to process him.

Still, I couldn't read her.

"Jacob?" Her voice was softer than I remembered. Death looked good on her, but with the assistance of the wind, her scent was as bland as those she was in company with.

Jacob shook, on the verge of phasing. I reached back, touching him, letting him know I was here. He leaned in automatically, pressing his shoulder against my back as his eyes focused on her, "Bella."

_This will be my last confession_

_"I love you" never felt like any blessing_

_Whisper it like it's a secret_

_Uttered to condemn the one who hears it_

_With a heavy heart_

**xXx**

**AN: I like to refer to the headline of Sleep: "_What if Twilight happened without Bella? What if Jacob and Edward weren't brought together by hate, but by love?"  
_Sleep would be the counterpart to "Twilight" (the first book) which has no Bella, but this is the "Breaking Dawn" counterpart, so there is Bella, but I assure you, she is not a main character and there will be no semblance of any similar relationship she had with either Edward or Jacob. Just a pleasant note for you readers.**

**As you can see, a lot is catching up with Jacob. The next two chapters will be a bit rough for him, but nothing as bad as James.**

**Let me know if you have any questions about anything. It's a bit to take in, I'm sure. Thanks for reading!**


	3. Death of a Dawn

**Author's Notes: **Yes, over a year. I know. Sigh. If you have no idea what this story is or cannot remember, I don't blame you. You can read the entire series ("Sleep" "Nightmare" and "Illusions", in that order) or if you have read this before, just review from the first chapter of Awake. I am currently re-editing "Nightmares" and "Illusions" during the next few days, so that should be looking fresh and fit for you guys. They are a horrid mess in need of grammar and typo attention.

Thanks to all readers who still mention "Awake" every now and again and check to see if I'm still alive. I am!

**Disclaimer: Slash. Werepire sex. C'mon, you shouold know this by now. **

**All original characters are not mine, though the characters Owen and Simon are. **

Lyrics from **Whenever, Wherever, Whatever **by **Maxwell**

**xXx**

**Chapter Three – Death of a Dawn**

_And if there's a thing that you need__  
__I'd give you the breath that I breathe__  
__and if ever you yearn for the love in me__  
__Whenever Wherever Whatever__  
_

**Jacob**

Another world flashed before my eyes, one where I was on the outskirts, not of the core. I knew loss, but not like I could know it in this world. How could I miss something that was never mine to begin with? In that world, they were bound to each other; it really didn't matter by what, because in that world he wasn't mine.

I could only imagine that they were happy, that he was as he was with me because that was all I really knew. I wondered if their sex was as mind altering or if he would give her those looks of pure and utter dedication as if he was staring at his everything.

_Everything_.

I heard him call me that. His everything.

"Bella." I acknowledged her, even as the world swayed and tilted on its axis. I said her name and yet I wondered what it would sound like if he said that name with the same love when he said mine.

Jean's eyes locked with my own and there was a flicker of distant understanding there before she smiled. I wanted to fucking rip her throat out for many reasons. James for one, but there was also the tiny fact that she was leading the Volturi right to our doorstep along with possibly my biggest threat. I looked at Bella briefly. What was odd was that she hadn't even looked at Edward yet. In fact, she seemed infatuated by _me._

"Our introduction will be quick." Jean spoke slowly. I could feel everyone tense around her. The pack, Sam included, were crouched low. They were waiting for the wrong move to be made. Jean appeared not to notice, "Some of us are already acquainted. Bella may be familiar with some of you. She's as integral as your family here, you see. Her skills are similar to Joan's – very important." With a slight turn of her head, she nodded towards the three males to her right.

"These boys, you're not so acquainted with, but something tells me friends will be made; Owen, Fred and Simon." A tall, slim blonde with a crew cut gave us a friendly nod. Another blonde, this one bigger and with curly hair appeared uncomfortable. I watched as he observed the pack curiously, as if deciphering whether we'd do more harm than good. The last of the three was a short kid. I would have sworn he was human, a mere innocent amongst creatures, but the red glint in his eyes said otherwise. He couldn't have been more than 5. If it hadn't been for my surprise of seeing Bella first, this kid would have had my attention initially. I suspected he was cute as a human, probably with rosy cheeks to go along with the short, dark brown tendrils on his head. Fuck, they killed a _kid_?

As if thinking the same thing, Esme spoke, "You have a child amongst you?" I caught the worry and concern in her eyes. It wasn't a surprise that she found this more disturbing than the rest of us.

Jean walked over to the kid, pressing her palm on his shoulder as if he was a noble soldier in war, "We didn't come along to Simon as we came along to the rest of our coven." She spoke gently, "He is...special."

"But a child…" Esme gasped.

"There are rules, we are aware. The Volturi have distaste for those who breed eternal beings so young."

"It's horrific." I was surprised to hear Rosalie growl.

Jean stood like a leader in front her coven. Even the small Joan was a few steps behind her. I watched as Bella remained still, eyes searching every one of us. I was still put off that she still hadn't found interest in Edward.

A hand pressed against the small of my back. He wanted to say something, I know, but now wasn't the time with about 2 dozen sensitive ears present.

"We're here because we didn't want to miss the lesson." Jean spoke as if she had not suspected the _hate_ most of us had for her, "I must say, Dr. Cullen, you know quite a bit about our adversaries. We're more than eager to participate as listeners." I looked to the Doc. He looked cautious, but as usual sported a polite –though small –smile.

"If it would help…" He began.

And like that, the coven blended amongst us. They kept to the margin of our group as I noticed my pack and Edward's family draw closer together. Never in my life, would I have thought I'd witness this…

I kept an eye on Bella. She was silent as well, but I did noticed how those round, ruby eyes would focus on me and the hand that held mine before her brows would furrow in confusion. Carlisle had spoken for what felt like hours and we sparred in that field for what felt like days. I wasn't surprised to find that every single one of Jean's vampires had gifts, little Simon included.

I watched as most of us sparred them with much trepidation. Emmett was paired against Owen, the blonde, whom to my surprise was as relaxed as Edward's biggest and goofiest brother. For a brief moment, even in the thick of the tension, they joked and taunted each other. I didn't know how Emmett could walk into this as relaxed as he did, but it lightened the mood briefly. Owen was easy on Emmett in the first round, but once Emmett joked about losing the training wheels, a small smirk curled up deviously on Owen's face.

"Right." Was all he said and we watched in awe as all of a sudden, Emmett began tripping and falling over his own legs.

"What the fu-" Emmett growled, clearly beat. It was as if watching a drunken man function.

I felt Edward stiffen behind me. He must have been getting some of what was mentally going on with Emmett , "I…" He started slowly, and then shook his head, "It's an interesting gift. He's a mind manipulator."

I continued to watch Emmett as he fell back on the ground, legs kicking out, "That's an evil offspring of yours and Jasper's gift, right?" I mumbled gravely. Finally, Owen let up, offering his hand to a defeated and dirty Emmett.

"I'll get your ass." Emmett growled. The guy always liked a challenge.

Though I could tell much of us were a bit taken aback and fucking intimidated by Owen, we pushed on. Carlisle reminded us that it was wise to learn how each of us functioned individually, so we'd be better prepared as a team. I had a funny inclination that he had a hidden ulterior motive, but we all participated. Edward took on Seth, Rosalie sparred Paul and the other coven watched in odd wonder, Bella included. Her eyes widened the first time she saw Sam phase before taking on Carlisle. She put two and two together and her eyes darted to mine. We shared a gaze, and I could have sworn nothing had changed for her. She appeared to be the same girl, until -of course- I realized just how still she sat and how red her eyes were. I looked away first.

It was my turn to spar. As I stood, unabashedly, shedding my clothes before phasing, I heard Jean offer one of hers. I stilled. Fuck, I didn't know what everyone else had up their sleeves.

Carlisle met eyes with Edward over my shoulder. There was a very audible growl from behind me. I turned to meet Edward's gaze, assuring him that it was okay.

"No." He barked out to Jean, "If you are going to use one of your own, they can fight with me."

"Edward-" I argued.

Jean smiled politely, but gave in, "Fine." He agreed, "You can fight Bella."

I felt my heart sink. And I couldn't help the rage I felt for Jean. I shot daggers her way, but she seemed unresponsive to it.

My rage simmered despite my permission and it only annoyed me more. This couldn't be happening. When I finally had him, when we finally were getting back to normal, something fucked had to get in the way.

My mind began to race.

What if it wasn't meant to be? What if in the end, it was her he was going to be with? What if neither of us got that happy ending? Scenarios were quicker than thoughts. Images of their bodies against each other, longing glances-

"Jacob." Edward spoke softly.

But I couldn't stop. A wedding. God, I pictured a _wedding_. Maybe I was only meant to have him to save my pack. No matter how secure I was in loving him, no matter how secure I was in his love for me, I knew this could all change, because it always changed every time I felt him, looked at him. I loved and needed him more and more-

"Jacob, love." I felt his cool fingers cupping my cheek.

"Be careful." I whispered to him, giving him a weak smile. He was there with me, he knew what I was thinking, but I still attempted to hide as much as I could from him. I focused on the pack and strategies to use for sparring, hoping to deter him from my previous thoughts, but it didn't work. His fingers stroked my cheek before he applied a chaste kiss on my lips.

"My love." He whispered for my ears only and I couldn't contain the shutter that rushed through my body. He turned around, stepping into the opening in the circle awaiting his opponent. There was no use to be naked now. I redressed and watching in anticipation.

And I was surprised.

Bella stepped in with nonchalance, her eyes meeting mine only briefly before she faced Edward. Their fight was uneventful if no one was observant to Edward's skill, but we all were. And we noticed that she was his weakness. He couldn't read her and he had to focus on small slips of movement and hesitance. Though their motions were both fluid, they seemed out of sync with the other. I knew much of it was due to Edward's inability to use his advantage, but there was an echo of something else, another reason I couldn't put my finger on.

As if expecting an answer, my eyes drifted to Jean, only to see her watching me with a look of _assurance_. I didn't know what to make of it.

The spar ended with Edward finally managing an upper hand, knocking Bella a good distance away from the circle. She landed gracefully on her feet a few yards away with a sparkle in her eyes.

"You're good." It was the second time I heard her speak and it was directed at Edward. I couldn't help that I was jealous. She was offering him a damn compliment.

"You are very talented for a newborn." Edward said back. And damn if I didn't see red. I set my jaw and coaxed myself to relax.

"How about one more before we call it a night?" Carlisle spoke to the circle, "Anyone willing to volunteer?"

I was on my feet quicker than I could think, "I will." I had anger and energy to vent. I started to strip again, but a hand on my wrist stopped me.

"Jacob," He started.

"It's just a spar, Edward." I answered, keeping my gaze lowered. I knew I was being immature and reacting to a simple exchange between the both of them, but the fear of that other universe where _they _existed as an item gnawed at me. I couldn't help feeling that this –what we were –was a ruse.

"I don't trust them."

"Neither of us do." And it was true, even as we sparred openly in front of them, I could see the distrust in everyone's eyes. No matter that they weren't a danger to us now, they had James in their midst before and he was what nearly killed two of our own and poisoned Edward and I.

"I'll be fine." I assured him and stepped away, towards the center of the circle where nearly all of us had our opportunity to shine. Who stepped in with me was the vamp named Fred. He gave me an uneasy smile and a shrug. It didn't seem like he wanted to do this.

"It's cool," I said lowly to him, "Just use your gift and I'll see how I can work around it, okay?"

He gave me a slow nod. I backed up, giving myself some room so I could phase. The transition was natural and once I was on all fours, I gave a long stretch relishing the feeling of being powerful again. I felt an intense stare on me and I knew it was Edward. It wasn't often he saw me like this.

I prepared myself for the attack, but found I couldn't place where Fred was. I looked to my right and didn't see him. I wondered where the hell he went. Was his gift being absurdly fast? I thought to look left, but something kept me from doing so. I _couldn't_ look left. I was sure looking in that direction wouldn't be good for me, yet with all the courage I could muster, I turned and simultaneously choked on my tongue. I was repulsed, disgusted. Whatever I was turning to had such an adverse effect on me, I had to look away.

_What the hell was that about?_

I tried again and was met with the same feeling. It took a while for me to realize that perhaps this was Fred's gift. He can make himself avoided.

"It's a technique to help him stay under the radar." Edward told me once I had phased back after being unsuccessful in taking him down, let alone seeing him, "I'm starting to realize that Jean picked them because they can mostly function without being touched, though I'm still unsure if Bella's gift is just me not being able to read her mind." He said with a hint of curiosity.

"Of course you'd be interested in what she has up her sleeves." I muttered, buckling up my jeans.

"I'm yours." He spoke softly. My eyes shut at the flashback of being inside him. He would have screamed that all night if I asked, I knew it for a fact. But the doubt was a bad taste at the back of my throat. Or it could have been the actual vomit from my spar with Fred. His fingers threaded with mine before he lifted our hands, kissing the back of mine, "Sam wants to talk to you."

I turned towards the pack, and sure enough, Sam stood off to the side with a look of impatience. As I made to walk over to him, I listened in as Carlisle wrapped up the meeting. We had been in the clearing for over 12 hours and he was well aware that the pack had to recoup and rest before continuing training and taking in any information. We were to meet in about 8 hours, so there wasn't much rest we'd be getting.

Everyone broke apart, the pack bleeding in the background as half of the Cullen's disappeared. They were most likely running home or wherever to relax for the next few hours.

"What's up?" I asked, approaching Sam. He looked a little uncomfortable standing between what was left of the Cullens and Jean's coven.

"I'll be coming by later tonight to discuss a few things with Carlisle and I'll be bringing Seth, Collin and Brady. They'll need to catch up on a few things." I frowned. Catch up? I quickly searched the area. Sure enough, the retreating backs of the pack weren't the familiar shade of blonde tufts of hair. Seth wasn't here. And Collin and Brady? No shit. He wasn't kidding when he said there were more of us.

"Why-?" But he gave me the silent command to keep my mouth shut.

"I'll need your help." His tone was final. Great, I had a task at hand. It was a shame I hadn't been paying attention to anything as much as I wanted. Not with Edward and Bella as distractions, "We're going to need to train the rest."

**Edward**

He was tired, almost dead on his feet. I watched helplessly as he stumbled about, kicking out of his jeans before collapsing on the bed next to me where I again reviewed Carlisle's journal.

"How did it go?" I asked gently.

"Hmph?" Was his muffled reply.

"The training, love." I clarified. With a grumble about being nosy, he turned over, facing me.

"They're young." He yawned, "And scared." His soft, brown eyes tightened in frustration as he tiredly placed his head on the plush pillow.

"It is expected."

He shook his head, "It is ridiculous. Fucked up." I lifted a hand, stroking his locks, loving the way he sought my touch automatically.

"I know."

"They're not supposed to suffer because of me running off like that, getting James' attention. I shouldn't have –" He stopped, catching himself. I could feel the remorse in his thoughts. He was lost, confused. If he hadn't have ran off those months ago, I wouldn't have found him. We wouldn't have had each other. He mentally apologized as he continued to speak, "Would it have been better if you were with her? Could all this have been avoided?"

He was silent for a moment, allowing me time to answer. I inhaled deeply, "No. There was one thing Jean told me; no matter what paths we chose, these things were to happen. Our choices change much but not everything. Some things are…fixed to happen." A thought crossed my mind, "I could only assume that's why Jean and Joan needed Bella."

Jacob sat up sharply, fury clouding his exhaustion, "So they kill her parents and take her?" He nearly roared.

"For all we know, that could have been James." I clasped a hand around his bicep, gently tugging him toward me, nonverbally suggesting he lay back down. He complied –though with a moment's hesitation –allowing his head to now settle on my lap.

"It still doesn't make sense." He growled, "If this shit is fixed, why the hell did they need to take Bella in the first place."

I had time to think about this earlier, "I'm beginning to understand Jean's ability. It has a bit more dimensions than Alice's, where she can see our choices, Jean can see beyond them, given the environment and context in time that shapes them. To put it simply, Alice can see which side of a chess board we play while Jean can see what moves would be necessary to win a game, if all game pieces are available."

"That…" Jacob frowned, "Still sounds confusing." With a scoff, he added, "And you just compared their special skills to chess."

I leaned over despite our awkward position, placing a chaste kiss on his temple. There was a moment of silence between us as I allowed him to think over our conversation. The process for him might have been sluggish due to days of new information bombarding him. Not to mention the hours training. After the brief break where he ate and napped, we had once again been immersed in preparation, learning of most of the nomad coven, while cataloguing the skills of the Volturi's guard. It had been during the second brief break that Jacob met with the rest of the pack, giving them all the lessons he had soaked in while training them along with Sam and Paul. Nearly half a day of that and he was attempting to understand the quirks of a nomad vampire's cognitive abilities.

"So, basically," He started slowly, "Certain things are fixed –no matter our choices –as long as we have all the important people necessary to make it happen."

"Yes." I confirmed.

"So in a way, for all this to happen, we _had_ to meet and shit had to have gone bad and I guess the Volturi have to come here."

"Yes."

"But they are going to take advantage of the Volturi coming here, so they can what…?"

"I believe they want the Volturi annihilated."

Jacob thought for a moment, "But that doesn't make any sense. It was because of them that the pack is now immune to venom and that we're pretty much on the same side. And it is them that lead the Volturi here. How does this…?"

"They need an army." And as the words left my lips, I was struck with a sudden sense of hope, "They need an army that they know could _actually_ kill off the Volturi."

Jacob sat up again, a light in his eyes, "Wait, you think they know we're going to win this?"

"Perhaps Jean." I calculated our odds and found myself pleased to admit that what we _did_ know about this coven, they had remarkable powers they could operate without the necessity of _touching_. Their powers were elusive, perhaps even easy to overpower a gathering of vampires, "She picked those vampires for a reason."

"Shit!" Jacob's eyes lit up, "You think we can come out of this alive."

My eyes met Jacob's, happy for even a sliver of a chance of keeping him safe, "We just might."

**xXx**

Alice confirmed that we had 10 hours.

It had been 2 days of training and learning of the coven. It had been 2 days of strategy, sparring and anticipation.

10 hours and counting and the moment I stepped through the threshold of my room, after a quick few hours of feeding to find Jacob waiting for me, aroused and demanding. We made love in more ways than I could imagine. It was rough, then slow, then overpowering. I felt his aggression, his pain, his love and it made and broke me simultaneously. Petting his locks, I came in inside him once more, securing my lips against the length of his neck, feeling his flesh give in under my teeth. With a muted whimper, Jacob came, my name on his lips.

"Yours." I whispered, licking the healing wound. He cooed in delight, holding me close. We lay there, time lost to us, our euphoria slowly ebbing away as the familiar noises of my family walking about the house caught my ears. They were back as well, though this time, my mind felt more bombarded with thoughts. There were others here. The nomad coven.

"What is it?" Jacob grunted from under me. His hands didn't cease their slow stroke along my back, but his voice was tight with concern.

"The coven is here." I answered, regretfully pulling away and out of him. There was a brief pout on his face, before he followed me, sitting up.

"Carlisle trusts them enough to bring them in the house?" I had pondered the same thing, but I knew Carlisle well enough to understand that he believed with shared enemies, the coven was no threat to us even if they awarded us no choice but to fight with them. There hadn't been any hostile interactions between us and them and interestingly enough, both Fred and Owen appeared safe, even when the remaining coven members were withdrawn.

"I think he knows we are of value to them," I spoke my thoughts, "Remember, they need all their pieces to win."

"Right," He answered, "But what happens when they won't need us?"

His fears were my own as well. There was a chance we could win against the Volturi, but it was still unknown if our allies would turn our enemies, "I guess we must see why they're here." I didn't want to leave the comfort of my room, of our space. I was selfish, unable to have Jacob just a few hours more. But the time was upon us, "Go shower. I'll meet you downstairs."

At that, Jacob let his pout linger, "Wait, why do I have to shower and you don't?"

I couldn't help my sheepish smile, "I enjoy the smell of you on me." I whispered lowly, hoping that at least the nomad coven wouldn't be able to hear my confession. Jacob watched me with hungry eyes and parted lips, his body already responding to my words, "And I don't want them lured by your blood." I motioned to the maroon mark on his neck, where my bite healed. He fingered it deftly, sighing.

"That's unfair." He growled.

"I know." I leaned forward, taking his chin with one hand and angling his face up for a kiss. He willingly obliged, despite his ranting thoughts of marching downstairs anyway, hungry, vampires be damned.

He watched me as I dressed, a scowl on his face. Just before I stepped out, he spoke, "Wait, vampires don't really find my blood all that appealing."

With a brief glance over my shoulder, I repeated, "I know." I closed the door before he could respond, a smile on my lips.

_Edward, you're a possessive asshole!_ He angrily directed his thought to me. He was right. It wasn't his blood I was concerned about, but his arousal. He was intoxicating, heavily scented with his juices. I wanted no desired looks his way and I wanted it to be known that I was indeed his. His scent all over me would prove just that. It was my silent pledge to him, whether he was aware of it or not. I was never to be with Bella and if I could help it, I was never to have him taken from me again.

**xXx**

"I find your diet…intriguing." Jean spoke, gliding along the front hall. Everyone but the coven watched her with cautious eyes.

Then, the small blonde Joan wrinkled her nose in disgust, "Repulsive." She spat, dancing on her heels, "Like dirty old blood from a dirty old, dead body." Despite her disgust for animal blood, she sounded almost…comical.

"We find it fitting and easier for us and our lifestyle." Carlisle answered politely,

"Don't mind Joan," Jean spoke up, "She died by the means of human blood and spent seventy years living for it. Old habits do indeed die hard."

"She died in a war?" Jasper asked, surprising everyone with his interest in the conversation.

"Yes." Jean answered honestly. Joan didn't appear to be listening to the two talk about her, instead, wondered off to where my piano sat but a few feet away, a childish glee on her face. Owen as well appeared to be interested in the furnishings and presentation of our home.

He whistled in awe, "You guys must be loaded."

"We're comfortable." Esme answered, looking as if she was biting back a smile. Bella watched her expression with interest, before letting her eyes settle on me. She was curious –that much I could read about her – red eyes ablaze with unknown thoughts. She spoke them without hesitation.

"Where is Jacob?" I couldn't help the tension in my body as she said his name. She proved not to be hostile, but her presence, her _existence_ had caused him pain and fear. It was irrational of me to dislike her for this very reason. I knew there was nothing she could do that would make me love her more than I loved him. She had no control over me. It wasn't that that Jacob feared anymore, but rather if being with her would have made things better, was how things were supposed to be. It was that thought in mind that I loathed, which ultimately meant I wanted her away from him and myself.

I didn't answer, averting my eyes and noticing just how everyone took interest in our exchange. Instead, I focused on the rest of the coven, taking in the absence of Fred –though I was sure he was here, but desired not to be seen –and the small child standing just a few feet away from his coven. His round, big eyes searched with the same interest as Owen. He appeared an inch taller than I remembered. It was quite puzzling, also given that he was so quiet and still.

Except for the small thumping pulse in his neck.

Why has this not been brought to our attention before? Almost three days and none of us noticed. I listened, attempting to hear the heartbeat, but only able to hear the healthy relaxed pulse of Jacob. I blinked in surprise, wondering if perhaps, even with my clear, inhuman vision I may have been seeing things. Jean had said this child was special. In what way and why couldn't I hear his heart?

"The child Simon." I spoke slowly, unable to lift my eyes from his neck, "Is he human?"

At that, everyone froze in the room, eyes on me or the small child. Rosalie and Esme seemed most interested and concerned.

"I don't hear a heartbeat." Alice spoke, stiffly stepping forward gauging her ears for any small sign of the familiar pulse of noise.

My eyes flitted to Joan who was innocently, stroking the keys of the Baby Grand, "Joan, I take it, has been able to keep us from hearing it." I realized, not hiding my awe. Joan had a remarkable and honed skill. I could only imagine what she would be able to do against an entire guard.

"You are quite clever, Edward." Jean said with an air of admiration in her tone, "More so than even I may have predicted." She must have concluded that there was no use to hide what the child was, so she explained, "I knew Simon would be of help to us. I saw him the moment he was conceived. A young human survived copulation with a vampire. She was burdened with survival and a life unlike any other growing inside of her."

"That's….impossible." Rosalie gasped. I found myself incapable of understanding the possibilities of this as well. She was assaulted, but not bitten? And she survived such a vicious attack, with child?

"How could a human survive that?" Carlisle –though clearly disgusted –was curious as to the frail physical condition of a human.

"You're not the only of our kind that cares for humans like special pets." She appeared thoughtful for a moment, "I would even say the vampire may have loved her enough. This is what they created." Her hand fell on the shoulder of the child, who for the first time appeared to show signs of his young age, looking up at Jean with mild curiosity, "His mother died during the birth and Simon would have died as well if not for my knowledge of his existence."

"What happened to the father?" Esme asked, a look of horror in her eyes.

Jean showed no sign of emotion as she spoke, "He asked for us to take his life as well. He seemed not to want to exist without her."

"Oh, my…" Without realizing her motions, Esme approached the child. I could sense her curiosity and wonder. Her sympathy was evident as well. The child noticed her approach, and to our surprise, stepped away as if in fear.

"Do not worry, child. I will not harm you." Esme desperately pleaded. Rosalie then stepped forward, driven by a deep desire to console him as well. I felt the hurt and remorse, when again the child stepped away, fearful of their approach, before running out of the room.

That had not been what I was expecting.

A sound of surprise had our attention before a voice carried from the stairs, "Whoa! What's up, little man?" A few moments later, Jacob appeared, the child in his arms as he looked at us curiously, "For a vampire, this kid is _really_ warm…and alive." He glared at Jean, coming to his own conclusion, "What the fuck is he supposed to be, a snack?"

Despite his anger, I felt warmth at his protective display. The child clung to him, little fingers clutched around his neck.

Jean merely smiled, "Interesting."

**xXx**

I couldn't hide just how my jaw dropped. This child…this _toddler_ was part human and vampire. And here I was under the impression that my life was as weird as things got. If it wasn't for the looks of disbelief and everyone's extremely heavy interest in the small child I was holding, I wouldn't have believed Jean. The kid was almost as warm me with a fast heartbeat, but felt human, kind of smelled human as well. And had no plans of letting go of me. I noticed how Rosalie's eyes narrowed in envy and attempted to do my best not to smirk triumphantly.

I failed.

It was a full house of vampires. The Cullens awkwardly stood away from the nomad coven, with the exception of Emmett who was already speaking and pointing random things out to Owen. I couldn't see Fred anywhere, but for all I knew, he was right next to me. I was suddenly aware that I was hearing music, though Edward stood not a few feet from me. Where the hell was that coming from?

"Joan." Sometimes it was good having a mind reader around, "Glad I can be of service to you." He said with an air of exasperation, though I could see that cute little adoring smirk he had. He was totally in love with me. At that thought, he rolled his eyes, such an endearing, human thing to do.

I stepped into the center of the room, child clinging to me like a little monkey, "So all we do now is wait, or-?" I asked, knowing that if I stood here with them for a minute longer, I'd lose my damn mind. Were they all just going to wait here…?

"They haven't made up their minds as to where they will be when they arrive." There was a forebodingly bad look on Alice's face, "It was clear before, but now…" I tensed, knowing what that could mean. If they were changing plans, we would have less time to prepare. As if sensing my discomfort, the child clung tighter to me, whimpering as if scared. I was confused. Now, out of the last few days, he was suddenly acting like a child? How did they take care of him?

"You must be careful." Jean spoke, "Now that Joan as eased her control on the child, he may…act out."

That didn't help the tension in my shoulders any, "That's such a nice phrase, 'act out', whatever could you mean?" I couldn't help the acidic sarcasm at her very _last _minute warning. It had finally occurred to me that this child was the _only_ one out of the coven whose trick we hadn't seen. And wasn't it my luck that we were about to find out.

It took a while for me to realize my skin was literally burning. At the touch of Edward's hand, I started, "What-?" I gasped then, feeling the strong sting, before it grew to a very _burning_ pain. There was a squeak before the child was pulled from my arms. I was surprised not to see Edward toss him, judging by the look of fury in his eyes. I blinked in shock, looking at my hands, skin burnt and peeling. The crinkle of flesh in my neck and upper back had me sure the same affect was happening. Wherever there was skin contact between me and the kid, there were burn marks.

Edward inhaled deeply, meeting my gaze as if silently asking if I was okay, if there needed to be a reason for him to attack Jean. I shook my head, saying I was fine.

_I'm already healing._

"What did he do to him?" Edward's voice was low, but definitely threatening.

"You were witness to it, were you not?" Jean asked evenly as if she wasn't seconds away from being attacked by a _very_ furious vampire. Before Edward could say anything else, someone else spoke.

"He is healing." It was Bella. Her voice was somewhat different than what I remembered, sounded surprised and impressed, "Such interesting creatures." God, how could I forget about her being in the room? Clearly, Edward spared her no attention earlier, but now his eyes watched her with a deathly focus. She was approaching us, her eyes fixed on my body healing under the now flaking dead skin. Like I was some sort of specimen, she reached out to touch, but was confronted with a growling Edward. She stopped wisely, eyes wide not from fear but intrigue.

"Edward." Carlisle chastised softly.

"She won't hurt him." Alice answered surely, "That is not her intention. You two are _fine._" The last word was loaded, though I wasn't sure what she could have meant. I searched for the small child –Simon, if my memory served right –who now stood behind the legs of Jean, blood-red eyes looking up at me in quiet distress.

"It's okay." I whispered to him, though honestly, who could be sure now with leech royalty and a sneaky coven ally on our side. I hadn't assured myself, but it appeared to relax Edward a bit, who protectively secured an arm around my waist, not before sighing as Simon moved from behind Jean tentatively reaching out a hand as if to ask for mine. Without hesitation, I offered my hand, only to have Edward gently knock it away.

I scowled at Edward, "Seriously, he's just a toddler."

"Not even a month old." Jean answered, eyebrows raised in amusement. The Cullens gaped, staring at the child with new wonder.

"This child has rapid maturation?" Carlisle asked, clearly slipping into doctor mode. I couldn't have been surprised, seeing as he was a hybrid.

"We are unsure exactly what the average aging time for his kind is, but I do know that Simon will come into adulthood where he will remain for many years."

"Immortal." Esme gasped.

"Somewhat." She answered, attention on me, just as I snuck my hand to grasp the child's. There was a small huff beside me and I felt Edward's arm tighten around my waist.

The next few hours, everyone marginally relaxed with the renewed interest of the hybrid toddler to talk about, speaking of which hadn't left my side since I stepped downstairs. It was nice that everyone's minds were at least partially distracted as they spoke and theorized about Simon's human and vampire traits, though as I watched I couldn't help but _feel_ time slipping away, the battle coming ever closer. Edward, Simon and I had walked the to the kitchen, sitting at the counter where I asked Simon if he was hungry. He didn't respond, only watched me through long lashes. I sighed, unsure if it was even right to have him here. God, no one was supposed to be here. The Cullens, Bella…I gulped down a breath, momentarily getting the battle jitters. If anyone was to get hurt or killed –flashes of Seth, Quil, Embry, Sam –I wouldn't forgive myself.

Cool fingers stroked my skin, calling me out of my mind, "If all goes according to plan, they'll be fine." I wasn't convinced, "We cannot change the past, love, but we do have control of what we can do now."

"I know I'm being a broken record here, but I can't help thinking if things were different-"

"Was it not worth us finding and having each other?" He asked, clearly upset by my train of thought. Just hearing him sound so anxious made it hard to even breathe. I inhaled deeply, finding my voice.

"You're worth it all, even if I lose everything, but it's still a bit selfish to accept this face value without considering how things could have been different."

He leaned into me, his breath fanning against my neck, "Your heart is bigger than you'd like to admit, Jake." He whispered, "You prefer a path where no one is hurt or killed, but there is no escaping this, unless of course you want to-"

"We are not leaving." I cut him off. That seemed to be the end of that conversation, but he spoke again, this time in such a tender manner.

"It's when I'm sure I love you with all that I have, that you surprise me." I blinked in surprised.

"What do you mean?" He didn't answer, merely kissing my temple. There was a low, whine beside me, before I saw a hand shoot out, breaking any contact between Edward and I. I laughed out, noticing Edward's face contort into a glower, which he effectively hid from Simon.

"I guess he doesn't like anyone else touching me." I teased Edward, "But look, you both have something in common now."

"Other than being capable of hurting you?" He added bitterly. Count on Edward to go from sweet to sour within the span of 10 seconds. I made to answer with some sort of snarky response when suddenly Edward stiffened, before leaving my sight instantly. He couldn't have been _that_ angry.

But then I heard it.

"No…" The drawn out cry of Alice, "No, they are coming. Sooner than…" And she was silent. I got up from the kitchen counter, taking Simon with me as we entered the living room where all the other vampires had come to gather around Alice.

"They're coming here." Edward said darkly, just as I was about to impatiently ask what the hell was going on. He was already at my side, hand clasping around my own. I could feel it, his need to keep me safe, to fight.

"To the house?" Carlisle seemed pensive, "How many?"

"It's only Aro, Caius and Marcus and a few guards"

"Alec and Jane?" Carlisle pressed.

"No." She shook her head.

"Who are Alec and Jane again?" I asked Edward, all that he told me about the Volturi a blur of information.

"Alec and Jane are part of the guard, important to Aro." Edward said quickly. My thoughts spun at the information. I remembered. They were _important _alright, if their special skills spoke for them. And they weren't coming here?

"What does this mean then?" Rosalie questioned.

"They have left themselves vulnerable." Jasper spoke softly, "It could be a show of peace." He said though it was quietly followed by, "Or a clever strategic maneuver."

"To catch us off guard." Carlisle answered.

"They'll be here within the next 15 minutes." Alice said quickly, coming back to the conversation, "Whatever we need to do, we have little time to figure it out."

"The Volturi only know that there are wolves here, but they are not aware that we will be here to assist you. We have purposely kept from seeking their attention." Jean said strongly, the coven already assembled behind her, "It is wise that they remain unaware of us. It would still provide us with an advantage."

"Also, if they were to see the child, they wouldn't understand." Esme added.

Carlisle nodded, "You can make yourselves unseen and unheard, do so now before they come." At that, the coven was already gracefully exiting through the back way of the house, though Simon remained with me.

"And Jacob." Edward added.

I frowned, "What?"

But he was already talking to Carlisle, "They will want him, you know this. They find him as some sick novelty and they will try to collect him. If we want any chances of peaceful talk, he should be with the nomad coven."

Carlisle was pensive for a split second, "You're right, Edward, but you will have to remain here." He said regretfully.

"Wherever he goes, I follow."'

"Yes, but it would be just as unwise to be missing amongst us as it would be to have him here." Carlisle was right of course. They would know something was up if Edward was missing. Not to mention, it would only prove that I was important to him. If they were to see that, it would be a weakness they could locate for both of us.

Edward opened his mouth to argue, but I was quicker, "I'll be safe with the nomad coven. With Joan, I'll be invisible and we'll be close enough to attack if anything should go wrong." I spoke to the group before turning to Edward, lowering my voice for him "I'm not going anywhere. I'll be right outside."

But I could see my words weren't working. If he couldn't see me or touch me, I was at risk of danger. I could understand this, after what James had done. At my trailing thoughts, he shut his eyes tightly, fighting off the inevitable and wisest decision, "Love." His voice broke, "I can't."

"Edward," I whispered, "I'll be fine. You're the one I have to worry about and keep safe, okay?" And he was. I didn't trust these Volturi as far as Simon could throw them.

Not caring that we had an audience, Edward held my shoulders as if I were fragile, some weak human and tenderly leaned in for a soft kiss, his hands working its way up my neck to cradle my face. He pulled away far enough to watch me, golden eyes committing my face to memory.

"Don't worry." I repeated.

_I love you_. I said for his mind only.

It was still a pleasant and rare thing to hear his voice in my head, but the echoing, _My love…_ stayed with me even as I left the building walking into the thicket of trees. I found the vampires about a quarter mile in, standing still awaiting Simon and my company.

"This doesn't look like it's going to be good." Owen's ruby eyes shone in the night, even though his expression was nothing but friendly.

"Joan will make sure all senses and skills are dulled. It would be as if we haven't existed in that house." Jean spoke, "If anything does indeed go wrong, we are but a few seconds away."

"Here's to good luck then." Owen said skeptically.

I jumped, hearing Fred speak next to me. It was my first time seeing him in a day, "You and Edward are mates?" He spoke quietly in my ear.

I nodded, "We are." At that confession, I once again remembered Bella was not far.

"I never heard of a werewolf being mates with a vampire. Then again, I never heard of vampire and human hybrids until a few weeks ago." He shrugged, "This is a strange, strange world." The last sentence seemed to be meant for himself though I couldn't disagree.

"Amen to that." I sighed.

"I'm surprised you could be apart like that so willingly." Owen added in on the conversation, "Joan and Jean are mated and it's rare when they are so far apart. It's a bad idea keeping them separate." He shook his head as if knowing this from experience.

He was right, mated or imprinted, being separated could be a strain and I preferred we weren't too far from each other for too long. It was odd how hollow, weak I felt without him.

Then something struck me.

Separation_…_

"_It could be a show of peace or a clever strategic maneuver."_

"_To catch us off guard."_

"_Alec and Jane are part of the guard, important to Aro."_

_"It's a bad idea keeping them separate"_

But that was supposed to be our advantage. The Volturi were not to know that there was more of us, hiding and waiting, ready to show the moment they met us for battle. But maybe they were one step ahead of us, using that to their advantage. Maybe _we_ were the ones that were really going to be caught off guard. They knew Alice would see them approaching, they knew we'd assume they were coming to speak civilly, using our own humanity against us. And if the important Alec and Jane weren't present, that could only mean…

"The pack!" I was able to gasp out, already stripping out of my clothes, "This is a fucking trap! They are sending the rest of their guard to take out the pack. They _know_ they are outnumbered and are fucking using our separation against us." There was no time to wait for answers, to warn the Cullens. By now, the Volturi would already be in the Cullen house, keeping them occupied while they believed my pack would be moments away from death.

I phased instantly, awaiting the voice of my pack and wasn't relieved to know I was right. Visuals of colliding forces, fur and stone, blood, venom and fire. Fuck, the battle had already begun and we didn't know.

**xXx**

**AN: Some love for the boys is welcome. This is the second to last chapter. You know what that means. ONE MORE CHAPTER TO GO! Review with all your might if you want it A.S.A.P (meaning you guys not waiting another year) As for now, *cracks knuckles* I got some other incompletes to catch up on.**


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